Many young people say that mobile phones are the most important object that they own. Does the popularity of mobile phones among young people have more advantages or disadvantages?

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In recent years, with the development of technology in many industries mobile phones started to create a lot of conveniences for humans, especially for the younger population. These items take place as an identity among individuals,

while

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there are several benefits of using the phones for easier communication between people and drawbacks to their own personal information brought by

this

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trend. I believe that the benefits of using mobile devices outweigh the disadvantages. One major benefit of

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device is that it makes communication more functional and convenient among users.

Firstly

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, communities can communicate with each other by the online platforms provided by phones.

For example

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, the application of WhatsApp helps to create a suitable platform for long-distance conversations through voice calls and video calls.

Secondly

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, the workers can form hybrid meetings on their own devices to discuss their own personal experiences. They do not need to meet directly, they can meet anywhere and anytime by online meeting platforms

such

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as Zoom. Not only do they have a wide variety of services but

also

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they

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but they

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can

also

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share anything via online chat,

such

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as presentation documents, papers, pictures, and videos to support details for their tasks.

On the other hand

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, there are some disadvantages offered by

this

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condition. The accessibility of information wherever and whenever creates a lot of crimes in terms of plagiarism.

For example

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while

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writing an essay, there is no protection in the sources of data, in which people can copy and paste any information from the website without knowing the original references.

In addition

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this

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, sometimes personal details

also

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can be accessed through the Internet, so because of the phone. It is a danger for citizens

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apply

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because many criminals use society's data for their personal goals. In conclusion, mobile devices now play a crucial role for human beings.

Besides

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, it provides obvious positive changes to their lives,

such

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as more efficiency in communication and work.

However

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, it brings up several issues and dangers for communities.

Consequently

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this

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trend has more positive impacts than negative effects.

alarayazcSun Mar 30 2025

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task achievement

Introductions should provide a clear overview of the main points you will discuss in the essay, giving the reader a better expectation of the content.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that your ideas in each paragraph are logically ordered and transition smoothly to improve coherence.

task achievement

Try to include more specific examples that clearly illustrate the disadvantages you've mentioned, as this will strengthen your argument further.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear argument that favors the advantages of mobile phones, aligning well with the prompt.

task achievement

You have made good use of examples, such as WhatsApp and Zoom, to illustrate the benefits of mobile phones for communication and work.

12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

340 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

connectivity
instant messaging
social media
access to information
entertainment options
addiction
mental health
face-to-face interactions
distraction
academic performance
productivity
privacy
security
personal information
misuse

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Many young people say that mobile phones are the most important object that they own. Does the popularity of mobile phones among young people have more advantages or disadvantages?

Across the world, local shops are closing due to losing customers to online competitors. What problems does this produce? And what solutions can you suggest to overcome them?

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is predicted that the use of robots in our life is on the rise. What role do they play? Do you think robots will be of help in the future?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?