In some countries, a lot of children have health issues and are becoming overweight. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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İn our contemporary society, many

children

Use synonyms

possess health problems, one of which is obesity. Some

people

Use synonyms

advocate that the

government

Use synonyms

should be obligated to cope with

this

Linking Words

issue. Others argue that it is not the

government

Use synonyms

's job. From my standpoint, the

Government

Use synonyms

should play a crucial role in healing. In the upcoming paragraphs,

this

Linking Words

essay will elucidate my opinion on

this

Linking Words

topic and discuss the pros and cons of

this

Linking Words

phenomenon. First and foremost, Humanity has various concerns in today's world, and one of the most significant problems is overweight

children

Use synonyms

. Staying healthy has been crucial since the beginning of modern life, and all governments have some responsibility to solve

this

Linking Words

issue. Politicians and Mayors should construct sports facilities like swimming pools, basketball fields, etc. These facilities can be beneficial for

children

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to overcome

this

Linking Words

issue. They can stay active in a life with others.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, governments should make

people

Use synonyms

more conscious

with

Change preposition

show examples

some advertisements.

Also

Linking Words

, they need to explain the harmful effects on the human body with the conferences.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, others advocate that

this

Linking Words

is not the

government

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's obligation and that

people

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should fix

this

Linking Words

problem alone. Obesity is more prevalent than in old times because of some

motionless

Correct word choice

repetitive

show examples

activities

such

Linking Words

as video games, chatting, etc.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, Being obese will be more common in the next century, which is a communal concern of humanity.

However

Linking Words

, it can be fixed with the correct enforcement by the

government

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. The

government

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should encourage younger

people

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to do some activities and lose weight. Areas and parks should be built for

children

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to stay active. All in all, it has sparked significant debate between

people

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, and balancing these perspectives is a complex challenge, but being obese is a problem that spreads day by day for

children

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all around the world. Some practices

make

Wrong verb form

made

show examples

by the

government

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can reduce the harms of

this

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for younger

people

Use synonyms

barmanakarsuThu Apr 03 2025

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task achievement

The introduction presents the topic and your standpoint well. Ensure clarity by explicitly stating your position in the thesis statement, indicating the extent of your agreement or disagreement.

task achievement

Consider providing more specific examples or statistics to support your points. This will enhance the persuasiveness of your argument and provide a comprehensive response.

coherence and cohesion

While the essay flows logically, using more cohesive devices (like 'furthermore', 'in addition', etc.) can improve the connections between ideas and paragraphs.

coherence and cohesion

The conclusion summarizes the main points, but it could be stronger. Aim to reiterate your position clearly and leave the reader with a thought-provoking statement or call to action.

content

Your essay addresses a relevant and contemporary issue, reflecting an awareness of societal concerns.

content

You present a balanced view by acknowledging opposing arguments, which shows critical thinking.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

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In some countries, a lot of children have health issues and are becoming overweight. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities is by reducing the need for people to travel from home to work , shopping and education.To what extent do you agree or disagree?Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge

Telling the truth at all times is not essential. On some occasions, it is necessary to tell lies, and it is wrong to tell the truth. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries, more and more women have full-time jobs as men. There is a logic that they should share the housework equally with men. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Due to poorer countries experiecing a 'brain drain' they are seeing many professionals, such as doctors and teachers, leaving to work in more developed countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can be suggested to deal with these situations?