IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays, most of the information is available on the Internet, whereas in the past, knowledge was stored in books and on paper. Do you think the advantages of this situation outweigh its disadvantages?

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In recent years, most of the
information
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 has become available on the
Internet
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,
while
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 in the past, knowledge was primarily stored in
books
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 and on paper.
This
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 shift has brought both advantages and disadvantages. In my opinion, the benefits of having
information
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 online outweigh the drawbacks. One of the biggest advantages is convenience. People can access
information
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 instantly from anywhere in the world, provided they have an
internet
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 connection.
For example
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, students can quickly search for research material or answers to questions, saving
time
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 compared to the old method of going to libraries or searching through
books
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.
Moreover
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, the
Internet
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 offers a vast amount of
information
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 on countless topics, far beyond what is available in traditional
books
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.
For instance
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, online courses, articles, videos, and tutorials are available to anyone, enabling continuous learning without any geographical limits.
Additionally
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, the
Internet
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 allows for real-
time
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 updates, something
books
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 cannot do. News, weather reports, and other important
information
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 are instantly updated online.
In contrast
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, printed newspapers and magazines require
time
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 to print and distribute, meaning they often contain outdated
information
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 by the
time
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 they reach the reader.
However
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, there are
also
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 disadvantages to
this
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 digital shift. One problem is the reliability of online
information
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.
While
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 the
Internet
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 has a wealth of knowledge, not all of it is trustworthy. Anyone can post content, and much of it can be false, misleading, or biased.
This
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 makes it difficult for people to discern accurate
information
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.
Moreover
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, excessive use of the
Internet
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 can have negative effects on health,
such
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 as eye strain, poor posture, and a sedentary lifestyle. In conclusion, despite the challenges of verifying online content and the potential health impacts, the advantages of instant access to a vast amount of
information
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 make the
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 an invaluable resource. As long as users are careful about the sources they rely on and take steps to manage their screen
time
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, the benefits of having
information
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 online clearly outweigh the disadvantages.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas in each paragraph. Although you have good points, adding more details or examples could strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in logical progression of ideas.
task achievement
You presented a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, demonstrating good task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital Age
  • Information Overload
  • Convenience
  • Accessibility
  • Digital Divide
  • Knowledge Dissemination
  • Reliability
  • Data Privacy
  • Cybersecurity
  • Environmental Impact
  • Up-to-date Information
  • Critical Thinking Skills
What to do next:
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