Some people believe that technological advancements lead to a loss of privacy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?"

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Owing to the necessity of

user

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satisfaction, there is no doubt that ensuring

privacy

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is crucial for

user

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safety. It is a commonly held belief that improved technological capabilities lead to better

privacy

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services.

However

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, there is

also

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an opposing argument suggesting that

technology

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can pose risks if misused. I believe that advanced

technology

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plays a vital role in protecting data, particularly when used responsibly.

To begin

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with, the importance of technological development is crucial in addressing

privacy

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concerns.

In other words

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, innovation in

technology

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enables a wide range of

privacy

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-focused features.

Additionally

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, with high-level technological advancements, effective prioritization of protection becomes more achievable.

For example

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, smart home security systems, including surveillance cameras, are vital for ensuring the safety of parents who may be occupied. These systems often come with added comfort,

such

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as voice-controlled lighting, enhancing both safety and convenience. Another point to consider is that modern smartphones offer powerful

privacy

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features. It is

also

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widely recognized that brands like Apple and Huawei have made significant contributions to prioritizing

user

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privacy

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For instance

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, users are given the option to lock their screens, hide photos and messages, and apply personalized security settings.

Moreover

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, the use of Face ID in place of traditional passwords represents an advanced standard of

privacy

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protection within mobile applications. In conclusion,

although

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people may hold differing views, I strongly support the idea that advanced

technology

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enhances the quality of

privacy

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services in various aspects of life,

such

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as home security and mobile phone applications. I am confident that when used wisely,

technology

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can offer significant benefits in terms of

user

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protection and satisfaction.

lujainhatemTue Apr 08 2025

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task achievement

Consider elaborating on the opposing argument regarding the risks of technology on privacy. This could add depth to your discussion and provide a more balanced view.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that directly indicates the main idea of that paragraph. This enhances logical flow and coherence.

coherence and cohesion

When concluding, summarizing the key points more explicitly could help reinforce your argument and make the conclusion more impactful.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear opinion and commitment to the belief that technology enhances privacy, illustrating strong engagement with the topic.

task achievement

You effectively use examples from everyday life, such as smart home security systems and smartphones, to support your points, making your argument more relatable.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

technological advancements
privacy
surveillance
data sharing
encryption
digital literacy
facial recognition
CCTV
public spaces
security measures
information accessibility
digital footprint
individual responsibility
informed choices
data protection
Internet of Things (IoT)
cloud computing
cybersecurity
potential risks
balance of security and privacy

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Some people believe that technological advancements lead to a loss of privacy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?"

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Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research businesses and the academic world, Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to share freely. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.