IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

With the development of technology, university education should be completely switched to online. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are several benefits to
students
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 learning online.
First,
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it is convenient for
students
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 to learn at their own learning speed and schedules, which could ensure that learners understand the lessons.
For example
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, if the
students
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 are confused about a lesson, they could learn that lesson again until they get it.
In addition
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, their suitable timetable makes them comfortable to learn, which contributes to increasing their learning progress. In the long run,
this
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 could help them achieve
a
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apply
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good academic performance.
Second,
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e-learning could allow
students
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 to save their time commuting between their houses and schools and their money spent on petrol.
This
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 could be obvious when there is a traffic jam.
As a result
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, learning online gives
students
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 more free time for their favourite activities and more chances to take part in other classes to improve their skills.

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task achievement
Consider including a clear thesis statement in your introduction to outline your position on switching to online education. This can help frame your argument more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Work on having a stronger conclusion that summarises your main points clearly and reiterates your position on the topic. It can help in reinforcing your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure to clearly state your ideas and link them logically. For instance, when you mention benefits, you could separate them more distinctly in your structure for better flow.
task achievement
Good use of examples to support your points, which helps make your argument more persuasive.
task achievement
You provide specific details about personal experiences with online learning, which adds depth to your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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