IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

it is important to give children the opportunity to make decisions from an early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Owing to the necessity of sensing responsibility, there is no doubt that ensuring opportunities for decision-making is crucial for children's growth environment. It is a commonly held belief that asking the problem
solutions
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 with kids can positively pursue a future mature mind. There is
also
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 an argument that opposes
this
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 idea. In my opinion,
i
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 consider that encouraging children to provide opinions and
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 is essential for a mature and responsible personality in the future.
to begin
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 with, it is widely known that challenges are linked to satisfaction in early childhood age, significantly when engaging in non-purposeful play activities.
However
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, play activities with targeted purposes can demonstrably contribute a positive impact on their behaviour.
for example
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, simulating a critical situation activity that requires decision-making can lead to a child's mind nourishment.
Additionally
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, prioritize a specific time in daily routine for chat and effective
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 exchange.
For instance
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, sharing knowledge with my son about school concerns and finding
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 together. adversely, it can be quite challenging for children who have behavioural issues
such
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 as Autism Spectrum Disorder. it is
also
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 possible to say that, the proper response of an autistic child with opinion questions may be unachievable.
For example
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, lack of proper response when asked to choose between appropriate t-shirt colours
due to
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 a lack their ability to express themselves. In conclusion, despite people having different sides of view,
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 strongly agree with providing a well-being child with an opportunity to make decisions through a playful environment for cultivating a growth mind and responsible personality in the future.

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Task Achievement
The introduction could be clearer in stating your position. Make sure to present your main argument explicitly at the end of the introduction.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure every paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea. This will help guide the reader and improve coherence.
Language Quality
Try to ensure that there are no grammatical errors, such as capitalization issues. Consistent grammar will enhance the readability of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider expanding on the conclusion to reiterate your main points. This would provide a stronger finish and reinforce your argument.
Task Achievement
You provided some relevant examples, like simulating critical situations and discussing school concerns with your son, which illustrate your points well.
Task Achievement
Your opinion is clearly stated, showing your agreement with the importance of decision-making opportunities for children.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • confidence
  • self-reliance
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • consequences
  • creativity
  • personal growth
  • preferences
  • judgment
  • impulsive
  • guidance
  • boundaries
  • balance
  • oversight
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