IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Which form of commute do you prefer ,your personal car of public transportation? Why or why not?

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Decision
Add an article
The decision
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 between commuting with one's own
car
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 or using a public transport system
such
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 as subways and buses to go between the home and the workplace can affect daily
live
Replace the word
life
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 easily,because working individuals usually have to do
this
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 as part of their daily routine.
While
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 some people adore the comfort of driving
private
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a private
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car
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 ,some people tend to use
a
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apply
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public
transportation
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due to
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 the
cost
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.Personally, I tend to prefer
a public transport
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public transport
a means of public transport
a mode of public transport
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, as it offers numerous advantages in terms of
cost
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 and responsibility. Dealing with the issues of one's own
vehicle
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 could be excessively overwhelming.
For instance
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, if a
vehicle
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 breaks down,the
car
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do
Change the verb form
does
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 not reach the destination,
Correct word choice
and stucking
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stucking
Correct your spelling
the
 person who
drive
Change the verb form
drives
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 by
in
Change preposition
apply
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the road until it is repaired.
By contrast
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,
although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
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 can be at public
transportation
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,
another
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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bus
always
Add a missing verb
is always
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 ready to gas to take you in.For commuting,I prefer public
tranportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
 which
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 a stopless service over driving private vehicles which you need to handle yourself in order to avoid
this
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 kind of struggle and some unexpected challenges. Using public
transportation
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 always is
cheaper
Correct article usage
the cheaper
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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way than the other,
due to
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 shared the
cost
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 by the passengers. So,each passenger
pay
Change the verb form
pays
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 only a portion of the total
cost
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.
For example
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,
Although
Linking Words
,the
cost
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 of a bus ticket could be under two dollars,you can go as much as the distance which can be gone by a private
car
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,spending over
approximitly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 two
hundreds
Change to singular
hundred
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. So,I often use public
transportation
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 to go to the office and the home rather than my own
car
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 to save my money. In conclusion,for me, in order to avoid unnecessary expenditure and take less obligation, using a public
transportation
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vehicle
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 for commuting is
better
Add an article
a better
the better
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 choice for commuting. It
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not only reduces the prices of
commute
Fix the agreement mistake
commutes
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but
also
Linking Words
 alleviates the stress regarding not working
Use synonyms
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
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.

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coherence and cohesion
The structure could be improved by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that supporting details are logically organized under these main ideas. Consider using topic sentences to make the main point of each paragraph more evident.
task achievement
Work on grammatical accuracy to improve the clarity of your writing. Watch for subject-verb agreement and sentence structure. Proofreading your work could help catch these small errors before submission.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or details to support your points. For instance, you could elaborate on what specific challenges are faced with personal vehicles or give more detailed comparisons of costs for bus vs. car commute.
task achievement
You clearly express your preference for public transportation and provide reasons to support your choice, which reflects personal engagement with the task.
task achievement
You presented both the advantages and disadvantages of both commuting methods, showing an understanding of the topic from multiple perspectives.
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