In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageijg population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people To what extent do the advantages of having an ageijg population outweigh the disadvantages

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Nowadays it is thought that

people

Use synonyms

have longer life spans than they used to before. A lot argue that an older generation can be a burden to some societies,

however

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, some believe that having older

people

Use synonyms

could account for some benefits. I, to some

extent

Add the comma(s)

extent,

show examples

agree that older

people

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can bring in more advantages than disadvantages as I shall

further

Linking Words

discuss my perspective in

this

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essay.

Firstly

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, it is well known that older

people

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always have a ton of wisdom and knowledge and they always find the correct ways to use and spread it.

This

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can help the younger generation to make the most out of the obtained information and make use of it today.

Also

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, having to say your kids met their great-grandparents, isn't that an amazing feeling? It is stated that when children are more exposed to their extended family, they easily grow the sense of family orientation and they tend to understand the importance of family.

In contrast

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, having an ageing population could mean a lot of hospitalizations. Old

people

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tend to easily get sick and almost all chronic diseases's main risk factor is old age. From a government's point of view,

this

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means bettering healthcare facilities which can be rather expensive.

Besides

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, it is thought that when older

people

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get sick, the disease does not only affect their general well-being but

also

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their mental state. Statistics illustrate that 60% of hospitalized patients over the age of 70 are

also

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depressed. In conclusion, both arguments state strong points,

however

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, from my standpoint, I believe that the idea of younger children having a connection with their grandparents and even great-grandparents who are

also

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teaching them wisdom and knowledge shall outweigh any financial or economic benefit.

doodihamdoonWed Apr 16 2025

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task achievement

Ensure that all points are clearly stated and directly address the question. For example, strengthen the connection between the benefits and the perspective of those who view an ageing population negatively.

coherence and cohesion

Consider using more cohesive devices to enhance the flow of ideas. Words like 'furthermore' or 'in addition' can guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.

task achievement

Include specific examples to illustrate your points more effectively, especially when discussing the benefits of having an elderly population.

task achievement

Your introduction sets a clear direction for the essay and acknowledges both sides of the argument.

task achievement

The points about the wisdom of older generations and the importance of family connections are well articulated and relevant.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level (Primary, Secondary, Higher). However, some say that individuals should pay for their university education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Write a letter to a teacher asking for a reference letter for a job and explain: – Why you have chosen him to write the reference letter – What kind of job you are applying for – Why you think you are suitable for this job

Some individuals advocate for improving public transportation systems as a means to reduce traffic congestion and air pollution. Conversely, others argue that private cars offer more convenience and freedom. Discuss both views and give your opinion.