R) It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Taking
risks
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is often seen as a necessary part of achieving growth and success, whether in
someone
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's
career
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or personal life.
While
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risk-taking can have potential drawbacks
such
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as failure or financial loss,
this
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essay agrees advantages far outweigh the disadvantages because
risks
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can lead to significant personal development and
career
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advancement. One of the main benefits of risk-taking is it pushes individuals to improvement and encourages growth.
Instead
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of stopping same level people can take significant
risks
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and
can
Verb problem
apply
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improve
himself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
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.
For example
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,
someone
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who
decide
Change the verb form
decides
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change
Fix the infinitive
to change
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own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
his own
her own
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career
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and decides to start
new
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a new
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business might face uncertainty, but enough experience makes
this
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risk very significant and
this
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person
start
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starts
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to gain more than before because of
this
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.
For instance
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, Microsoft was founded by Bill Gates in 1975 when he dropped out of Harvard to start a software company,
this
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was
very
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a very
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risky decision that led to one of the most powerful tech
company
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companies
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in the world.
On the other hand
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, it is true that taking
risks
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can
leads
Wrong verb form
lead
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to negative outcomes. Financial losses or
fail
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failure
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to
achieving
Change the verb form
achieve
show examples
Add an article
the goal
a goal
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goal
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goals
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are all real possibilities.
However
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, these possibilities often
comes
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come
show examples
with valuable lessons. Even failure can help
someone
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succeed later if they learn from it and improve.
For instance
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,
someone
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who takes
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
studying abroad may face cultural challenges, language barriers or other difficulties, but
this
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helps him build a global network and advantages in his
career
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. In conclusion,
although
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taking
risks
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involves uncertainty and potential downsides, the personal and professional growth that can result makes it worthwhile.
Therefore
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, I believe that the advantages of taking
risks
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significantly outweigh the disadvantages.

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coherence and cohesion
Work on ensuring that all your sentences flow smoothly together. This may involve using more linking words and phrases to create connections between ideas.
task achievement
Be mindful of grammatical accuracy in your sentences, especially in subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic, arguing effectively that the advantages of risk-taking outweigh the disadvantages.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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