IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be pasengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

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Many
people
Use synonyms
 believe that in the future all
cars
Use synonyms
 will be
driverless
Use synonyms
 which means
people
Use synonyms
 travelling inside these vehicles will be
pasengers
Correct your spelling
passengers
while
Linking Words
 some individuals believe that it will be problems
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 If
cars
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 coming
driverless
Use synonyms
. Both sides have
opposit
Correct your spelling
opposing
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
that means
Verb problem
which
show examples
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
show examples
 a huge
arguement
Correct your spelling
argument
 about
this
Linking Words
 subject. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss them before
presening
Correct your spelling
presenting
 my own opinion. To
bigin
Correct your spelling
begin
 with,
People
Use synonyms
 will save a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 and effort if transports become
driverless
Use synonyms
, They will have several things to
perfome
Correct your spelling
perform
 their
hobits
Correct your spelling
habits
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as reading books, Chating with friends and
focuse
Correct your spelling
focusing
 on a lecture during
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
traspors
Correct your spelling
transport
transports
instead
Linking Words
 of wasting their
time
Use synonyms
 for concentrate when they are driving.
For example
Linking Words
, AAS researchers have shown that 70% of
people
Use synonyms
 will save their
time
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 If transports become
driverless
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, If
cars
Use synonyms
 drive themselves might
a huge problems
Correct the article-noun agreement
huge problems
a huge problem
show examples
due to
Linking Words
cars
Use synonyms
lose
Wrong verb form
losing
show examples
 control and
run
Wrong verb form
running
show examples
 over
people
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 or
drive
Wrong verb form
driving
show examples
 fast and
crash
Wrong verb form
crashing
show examples
while
Linking Words
 several folk inside
Use synonyms
cars
Correct article usage
the cars
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as
tesla
Capitalize word
Tesla
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
a giant company
produce
Correct pronoun usage
that produce
show examples
driverless
Use synonyms
cars
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, There was
accident
Add an article
an accident
show examples
 in 2022 when a man was inside
Correct article usage
a tesla
show examples
tesla
Capitalize word
Tesla
show examples
while
Linking Words
 the car drove itself on
bridge
Add an article
the bridge
a bridge
show examples
. Suddenly, The car lost control and drove fast toward to
fonce
Correct your spelling
front
 of
bridge
Add an article
the bridge
show examples
then
Linking Words
crash
Wrong verb form
crashed
show examples
 down into
river
Add an article
the river
show examples
. In conclusion, it has a huge problem
people
Use synonyms
lost
Wrong verb form
lose
show examples
 their
time
Use synonyms
drive
Wrong verb form
driving
show examples
 themselves or
cars
Use synonyms
lost
Wrong verb form
lose
show examples
 control
itselv
Correct your spelling
themselves
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 the advantages of
driverless
Use synonyms
vehivles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 outweigh the disadvantages because the most important save
time
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 and their effort
instead
Linking Words
 of
lost
Verb problem
wasting
show examples
 their
time
Use synonyms
 and effort driving especially if they live in
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 enormous population of
Add an article
the city
show examples
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
.

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task achievement
Enhance the clarity of your introduction by clearly presenting both viewpoints and your own opinion in a structured way.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the main argument of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied sentence structures and improve grammar to ensure better flow and accuracy in your writing.
task achievement
You have presented a thoughtful discussion of advantages and disadvantages, showing an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your examples illustrate points effectively, particularly the Tesla incident.
coherence and cohesion
The essay follows a logical structure, even if it needs refining.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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