Nowadays many jobs are more stressful and the working day is longer. What are the reasons for this? What can employers do to help employees?

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There is no doubt that these days many jobs are more stressful, and people
work
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longer
hours
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. The question is: why is
this
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happening, and what can employers do to help? In
this
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essay, I will explain the reasons and give some solutions. In terms of the causes, the main reason given to support
this
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claim is that there is high competition in many workplaces. Companies want employees to do more in less time, which increases pressure. To illustrate, one worker may be asked to do the job of two or three people.
In other words
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,
this
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leads to long working
hours
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and more stress.
As a result
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, workers may feel exhausted and unhappy with their
work
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-life balance.
Moreover
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, technology is another reason for
this
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problem.
Firstly
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, people can receive
work
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emails and messages anytime, even at night or on weekends.
In other words
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,
work
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is always with them.
Secondly
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, job insecurity makes employees afraid of losing their jobs.
This
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is because they want to show they are valuable, so they
work
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harder and for longer
hours
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.
Also
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, some companies reduce staff, so each person has to do more tasks than before. In conclusion,
although
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technology and competition help businesses grow, they
also
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increase job stress.
Therefore
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, I believe that employers should support workers by offering flexible
hours
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and mental health services. In conclusion, it is evident that companies must ensure steps are taken to prevent
this
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problem from getting worse.

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task response
To improve your task response, ensure that you address both parts of the question in a more balanced way. Your essay focuses predominantly on the reasons for increased stress and longer working hours, but the solutions could be elaborated further.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow of your ideas by using clearer transition phrases to guide the reader through your points. This will help enhance coherence and make the argument more impactful.
structure
You present a clear introduction and conclusion, framing your argument well, which helps guide the reader through your essay.
examples
The examples provided clearly support your points, particularly regarding job insecurity and technology, which enhances your overall argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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