IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Your next door neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: – Your reason for writing – What you would like to happen – A nice, respectful style

Dear neighbour , I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter regarding the barking of your dog throughout the day and night . From
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 few days, we
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
noticing
Wrong verb form
noticed
show examples
 that your
owned
Replace the word
own
show examples
 pup barking
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
. That creates lots of problems for us . My job is to work from home so
due to
Linking Words
 your doggy I was unable to concentrate on my work which led to lots of mistakes . At night , after
stressful
Add an article
a stressful
show examples
 day of work when we go to bed to sleep we are unable to get good sleep because of our dogs barking . So , I request you to change the location of your doggy's cage from outside to inside or find any solution as per you . Thank you

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion
Consider using a more formal greeting such as 'Dear [Neighbour's Name]' and a closing like 'Sincerely' or 'Best regards'.
task achievement
Try to clarify the specific times during the day and night that the barking is most disruptive, and consider offering a specific solution rather than leaving it entirely up to your neighbour.
coherence and cohesion
Rephrase some sentences for better clarity and flow, for example, 'From the last few days' can be 'For the past few days'.
task achievement
The letter is respectful and clearly states the concerns regarding the barking.
task achievement
You have expressed your feelings about how the barking affects your work and sleep, which strengthens your request.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • disrupted
  • challenging
  • appreciate
  • solutions
  • training
  • anti-bark collars
  • excessive barking
  • resources
  • well-being
  • distress
  • amicably
  • cooperation
  • concern
  • neighbourly relations
  • understanding
What to do next:
Look at other essays: