The promoters of social media claim that they are connecting people and enabling people to share like never before. While critics claim that social media site often impinges upon one’s privacy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

With the advent of social

media

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, social

platforms

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enable

individuals

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to share their daily lives with others, publish posts, and express their opinions through 'Likes.' I agree that

this

Linking Words

trend offers

users

Use synonyms

numerous advantages;

however

Linking Words

, at the same time, I believe that there are significant concerns regarding privacy.

First,

Linking Words

the privacy of

individuals

Use synonyms

can be violated. Anyone would feel uncomfortable if someone, including the

platforms

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, monitored their private

information

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For instance

Linking Words

, a user scrolling through Instagram might unintentionally interact with a cosmetic post.

Following

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, the platform's algorithms analyze their browsing patterns and showcase targeted advertisements. In

such

Linking Words

cases, the user might not have explicitly consented to the processing of their personal

information

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is not the only issue. A significant amount of private

information

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such

Linking Words

as addresses, ages, and names, can be exposed through posts.

Although

Linking Words

most people do not misuse

this

Linking Words

data, malicious actors could exploit it for criminal purposes. The essence of

this

Linking Words

argument lies in the fact that

such

Linking Words

infringements often occur without the user's explicit consent.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, what compels

individuals

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to continue using these

platforms

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? The benefits are diverse.

Firstly

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, social

media

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provides opportunities for people to connect with others who share similar interests.

For example

Linking Words

, when someone 'Likes' a post, the uploader gains an opportunity to interact with others.

This

Linking Words

is largely because social

platforms

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operate on the internet, which eliminates barriers imposed by geographical distance.

Secondly

Linking Words

, it is commonplace for

users

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to encounter special promotions through these

platforms

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. Many companies utilize social networking sites as a means of advertising.

For instance

Linking Words

, renowned brands often market products with exclusive offers,

such

Linking Words

as a 10% discount or buy-one-get-one-free deals.

This

Linking Words

creates an enjoyable and engaging experience for

users

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To sum up

Linking Words

, I believe it can be stated with confidence that social

media

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brings significant benefits,

such

Linking Words

as enhanced connectivity and exclusive promotions,

while

Linking Words

at the same time posing risks to

users

Use synonyms

' privacy. To address these concerns, social

media

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providers should focus on creating a secure and user-friendly environment that protects personal

information

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

allowing

individuals

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to enjoy the benefits of connectivity.

cutegamSun Apr 27 2025

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Task Achievement

Include a more explicit thesis statement in the introduction to clearly outline your position regarding the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion

While your essay flows well, consider using more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the connections between ideas.

Task Achievement

Provide a broader range of examples to support your points, especially for the benefits of social media.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay has a clear logical structure, with your arguments presented in a logical order.

Task Achievement

You effectively outlined both views on the topic and presented a balanced discussion.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

349 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

connectivity
instant communication
self-expression
community building
global audience
social movements
data breaches
personal data
cyberbullying
mental health
social isolation
digital interaction
privacy concerns
addictive nature
idealized representations
support groups
awareness raising
transparency in data handling
user engagement
digital citizenship

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