Working from home is becoming more common. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, remote working has become mainstream in many countries. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both
advantages
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the advantages
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and disadvantages of
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phenomenon. From my perspective, working from home offers a wide variety of benefits. Most
people
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are willing to work remotely, because of flexibility and work-life balance. Not all individuals feel comfortable in the office, so remote work can offer flexibility depending on their preferences of location and time .
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,
people
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can choose a suitable place for themselves and manage their own time schedules.
Furthermore
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, work-life balance is an important factor for individuals which can provide them more opportunities to spend time with their family members, especially for
people
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who have kids.
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, both values are the benefits that working from home can provide.
On the other hand
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, remote working comes with some disadvantages as well. When employees are working in offices, they can be supervised by a manager or supervisor. Even though some
people
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might feel stressed, it is an effective approach to avoid low productivity. In
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way, the low concentration issue may be dealt with by not working remotely. Another disadvantage is lacking social interaction which may mitigate a sense of belonging,
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the fact that individuals can communicate with their coworkers to socialize.
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, these problems can be addressed by self-discipline and attending social events. In conclusion, working remotely can provide pros and cons. In my opinion, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages because
such
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values cannot be substituted by other measures.

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Task Achievement
Consider making your thesis statement in the introduction more explicit by clearly stating your overall view on the issue. For example, you could say that you believe the benefits of remote working outweigh its drawbacks.
Coherence and Cohesion
In the second paragraph, try to use more varied sentence structures to keep the reader engaged and help illustrate the points you're making more clearly. This will enhance the flow of your ideas.
Task Achievement
When mentioning examples, provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention specific studies or statistics related to remote work productivity or social interactions.
Task Achievement
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of remote working, which is important for thorough task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have structured your essay with clear paragraphs, making it easy to follow your argument and thoughts, which is a strong point for coherence and cohesion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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