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Writing Samples
Band 1.5

The diagram details the process of making leather products.(Anelya1)

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The given illustration depicts how
leather
Use synonyms
 products are made.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is a 9-stage, man-made, linear process. It begins with drying and delivering animal
leather
Use synonyms
 and ends in
factory
Add an article
the factory
a factory
show examples
, where
finally
Linking Words
 are made
leather
Use synonyms
 items. First of all, obtained animal
skins
Use synonyms
 are dried to make
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 completely dry. Following that,
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
delivered
Add a missing verb
are delivered
show examples
 to
factory
Add an article
the factory
show examples
, where the rest of the production steps take place. In turn, in the
leather
Use synonyms
foundry
Add a comma
foundry,
show examples
 the delivered animal
skins
Use synonyms
 are washed in
substance
Correct article usage
a substance
show examples
, which contains water and lime. After that, the washed
skins
Use synonyms
 are soaked just in lime consistency.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, the impregnated animal hides undergo flattening.
Then
Linking Words
 after that, the hides are soaked again, but in another substance which consists
liquid
Change preposition
of liquid
show examples
 and vegetable matter and
this
Linking Words
 consistency
called
Add a missing verb
is called
show examples
 tannin. From
this
Linking Words
, the
skins
Use synonyms
 are polished and
then
Linking Words
 delivered
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 another factory.
Finally
Linking Words
, in the second product fabrication made the different types of
leather
Use synonyms
 merchandise.

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task achievement
Consider providing a clearer overview or summary of the entire process at the beginning to help the reader understand the stages better.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the lexical range and vary your vocabulary to enhance your descriptions of the steps in the process. For instance, instead of repeating 'soaked' and 'washed,' try using synonyms or more descriptive phrases.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your sentences are grammatical, for example, 'them delivered' should be 'they are delivered.' I recommend revisiting sentence structure for clarity.
task achievement
You provided a logical sequence of stages in the leather-making process, which is essential for a process description.
task achievement
You included some specific details about materials used, such as lime and tannin, which adds to the credibility of your response.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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