Some people say a person’s success in adult life is the result of the way they were brought up as a child by their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

According to
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the beliefs of
the
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apply
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several individuals
growth
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of
the
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a
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person
is
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apply
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totally
depended
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depends
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on the early days of the care spent by the family with their kids.I, totally disagree with
this
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statment
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statement
. Certainly, parents
plays
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play
show examples
an irreplaceable role in the development of their child but other factors like personal experience and tendency to learn new things
also
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play a key role in the
growth
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of a person.
Hence
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, some of the key points are discussed in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
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,during
young
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a young
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age
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age,
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the mind of an individual is at its peak
leveal
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level
of learning.
Further
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, when he or she comes in the exposure to the society they grab new
experinces
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experiences
and skills which help them to become successful .To elaborate, APJ Abdul
Klam
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Kalam
is
the
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a
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huge example , he was brought up in the
orphonage
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orphanage
but was successful
to become
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in becoming
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India's seventh prime minister.
Unfortunatly
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Unfortunately
, he
was
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did
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not
having
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have
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family members who
can
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could
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guide him or
can
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apply
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give
directions
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him directions
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to
get
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apply
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succseded
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succeed
but because of his experience and
hardwork
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hard work
he managed to become successful.Moving ahead,a study
was
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apply
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conducted by
Hardvard
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Harvard
Universiy
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University
London, indicates that
the
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apply
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children who
are having
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have
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less exposure
of
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to
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there
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their
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family members in their
life
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are likely to get more
growth
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opportunities in
life
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.
Apart from
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this
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, another prominent reason is some
maternals
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materials
are very innocent
and
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apply
show examples
have conservative beliefs and do not allow
there
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their
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kids to follow
there
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their
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passion.
Unfortunatly
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Unfortunately
,
this
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hinders the
growth
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of an individual.
But
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On
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on the other hand
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, parents
also
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play an important role in the development of the child in
early
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their early
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years because they are the first teachers of
there
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their
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toddlers.
Further
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, they help
there
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their
show examples
young ones to learn basic and ethical values in
life
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which help them to construct a strong personality and act as
cherry
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the cherry
a cherry
show examples
on
a
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the
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cake in the matter of development.
To conclude
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,on the basis of the thoughts of some people that family members and the
stratigies
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strategies
used by them in the growing years of
there
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their
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kids
decides
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decide
show examples
the success in
the
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apply
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life
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. I strongly oppose
this
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motion because difficulties and tough
time
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times
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help build
a
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the
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strong character of an individual
help
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and help
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him to grow more in
life
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.

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task achievement
The introduction presents your position but could be clearer. Consider rephrasing for clarity and logical flow. For example: 'While many believe that a person's upbringing shapes their success, I disagree with this view.'
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that the paragraphs flow logically from one to another. Using transition words can aid in this. For instance, instead of 'but on the other hand,' you might use 'however.'
coherence and cohesion
There are several spelling and grammatical errors that affect readability, such as 'depended' (should be 'dependent'), 'experinces' (should be 'experiences'), and 'stratigies' (should be 'strategies'). Proofreading can help catch these errors.
content
You have made a strong case for your argument by presenting examples, such as APJ Abdul Kalam’s story, which adds depth to your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • upbringing
  • values
  • work ethic
  • interpersonal skills
  • educational opportunities
  • prioritize
  • emotional support
  • resilience
  • confidence
  • challenges
  • individual choices
  • external factors
  • personal motivation
  • societal influences
  • obstacles
  • determination
  • hard work
What to do next:
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