IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourist who visit such places?

Globalisation and technological advancements have made
travel
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 convenient. Unlike previous times, nowadays, tourists prefer to visit new
places
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 especially where weather conditions are harsh, and staying for a longer time is nearly impossible. There are a few advantages and disadvantages of
such
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trips
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, I will explain both sides in the upcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
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, I will explain about advantages. Commuters' main goal in
travel
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 is to get rid of from daily routines by having exciting
trips
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 to explore new things which help them to reduce stress, and refresh themselves with new energy and positivity. But
trips
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 to the same known
places
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 will make them bored,
hence
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, new
places
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 where the weather and living conditions are completely different, excite them to discover new things.
Also
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, known tourist
places
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 are getting filled with visitors crowds,
thus
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, will not serve the purpose of
travel
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 to those who need peace in their
trips
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.
For Example
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, Popular hilly stations like Kufri, Darjeeling, Dalhousie, and Mysore are crowded 365 days a year, whilst, on the other side,
places
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 like Leh Ladakh are very quiet, so one can actually experience the beauty of nature there in the calm settings.
Furthermore
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, Increased footprints at commonly visited
places
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 are increasing the pressure on natural resources there, and negatively impacting the aesthetic part of nature,
however
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, trends towards unknown
places
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 will give them time to replenish themselves. On the other side, commutes to hostile
places
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 where weather and living surroundings are not in
a
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apply
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favour of human life are filled with several disadvantages, ranging from day-to-day living to life-threatening happenings. The foremost reason is that
,
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 travellers are unaware of geographical conditions, so, they do not have clear guidelines that what are the important things to keep with them
while
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 travelling to that location , which eventually, makes their trip worse rather than fun.
Additionally
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, as the place is new to them, they do not know what are the significant sightseeing
places
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, so incomplete knowledge would give them the benefit of an incomplete trip, and would prove a worthless tour. Apart from that, owing to unawareness of the geography of that place, it would put life at risk. The Himalayan mountains are the correct example, where enormous glaciers are present, and their location cannot be traced.
Therefore
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, a little ignorance can put one's life at risk, many death outcomes have been noticed there when people do tracking in the Himalayan area. In conclusion, I would wrap up my essay by saying that, undeniably, new
places
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 will bring ecstatic feelings, though their drastic impacts cannot be neglected.
Hence
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, people should only visit those sites where they can get complete information about their surroundings.
This
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 is
also
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 a good opportunity for the tourist and
travel
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 industry to expand their businesses to new
places
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 which makes excursions safe for tourists.

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic adequately, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages effectively. However, consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments further.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the overall flow of your essay. Words and phrases that signal a transition could make your arguments more coherent.
coherence and cohesion
While your introduction sets a clear context, you might benefit from a more engaging hook to capture the reader's interest right from the start. Additionally, ensure that your conclusion summarizes the main points neatly.
task achievement
You have a clear understanding of both sides of the argument, which shows a good grasp of the topic.
task achievement
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages as required, showing a balanced perspective on the issue.
task achievement
Your use of examples, such as comparing crowded tourist spots with lesser-known destinations, effectively illustrates your points.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adventure
  • unique experiences
  • ecosystems
  • conservation efforts
  • economic benefits
  • environmental degradation
  • habitat destruction
  • safety risks
  • extreme weather conditions
  • navigation
  • high price tag
  • specialized equipment
  • influx
  • strain on local resources
What to do next:
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