Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the ‎causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on society.‎

These days, some

people

Use synonyms

spend less

time

Use synonyms

at home, especially those who live in metropolitan cities.

This

Linking Words

essay will elaborate on the reasons why

this

Linking Words

circumstance happens,

for instance

Linking Words

, citizens are getting busier.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay will

also

Linking Words

reveal the impacts of

this

Linking Words

situation on individuals and

society

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as a person will be more individualistic and

society

Use synonyms

culture

Use synonyms

will disappear. First and foremost, folks who live in the big cities are more likely to spend less

time

Use synonyms

at their homes.

This

Linking Words

happens because of the heavy workloads of their companies. To illustrate,

Jakarta

Use synonyms

, which is the capital city of Indonesia, has many enormous employers that are competitive in their business industries. Every late evening, we can see many employees who are still working in their offices to do their overtime and to fulfil their deadlines. Not only that, we are

also

Linking Words

facing heavy congestion after office hours since many

people

Use synonyms

from outskirt areas work in

Jakarta

Use synonyms

as well. These conditions make

people

Use synonyms

spend more

time

Use synonyms

in offices and roads.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

circumstance has an effect on individuals. As an example,

Jakarta

Use synonyms

citizens are more individualistic than citizens from other areas in Indonesia. To illustrate,

people

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who stay in

Jakarta

Use synonyms

do not really care about your outfits, as long as you can do your work well.

On the other hand

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

who live in other areas,

for example

Linking Words

, Bandung, are really

care

Replace the word

careful

show examples

with their wardrobes. You have to wear clothes that align with their norms.

Furthermore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

condition

also

Linking Words

will affect

society

Use synonyms

culture

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, kids nowadays have less respect with their elder groups. It might be kids have less

time

Use synonyms

with their parents and end up they don't know Indonesia's

culture

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, to have respect with older

people

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, nowadays, many

people

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spend less

time

Use synonyms

at home because they are getting busier. Meanwhile,

this

Linking Words

condition has an effect, not only on individuals but

also

Linking Words

society

Use synonyms

People

Use synonyms

are more likely to be individualistic and the

culture

Use synonyms

society

Use synonyms

will be lost.

ziziMon May 05 2025

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure all paragraphs fully develop the main ideas with clear topic sentences and supporting details. While your essay includes some interesting points, consider expanding on these for depth.

Task Achievement

Make sure to clearly connect your points to the overall question. While you touch on individualism and cultural loss, providing a clearer link between these effects and the reasons in your essay would strengthen your argument.

Task Achievement

Your introduction clearly outlines the main points of the essay, making it easy for the reader to follow what to expect.

Task Achievement

You provide relevant examples, particularly about Jakarta, which help illustrate your points effectively.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

job demands
work-life balance
remote working
digital entertainment
public spaces
urbanization
social and recreational options
networking
commuting
blurred boundaries
extroverted societal expectation
cafes and coworking spaces
smaller living spaces
cultural changes

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Nowadays, many people spend less and less time at home. What are the ‎causes of this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on society.‎

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

In some countries, more and more parents have begun to teach their children at home rather than send them to school. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree

In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective ways in maintaining link with the past. How effective can traditional costume be, in this sense? What other ways exist to help citizens connect with the country’s past?

Global warming is one of the most serious issues the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming, and what measures can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?