IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The increasing number of people travelling abroad for leisure is contributing to over-tourism in many destinations. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, more and more individuals prefer spending their free time in foreign countries, which leads to a large number of humans gathering in one area, resulting in constant overcrowding. Personally, I believe it to be a negative development, since
overtourism
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 is causing
harm
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 to
people
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 and ecology. First and foremost,
overtourism
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 inevitably leads to overcrowding. When lots of
people
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 suddenly decide to travel to another country on
holidays
Fix the agreement mistake
holiday
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, the streets of the foreign country get flooded with tourists.
Such
Linking Words
 an occurrence is bound to cause countless queues, obstruct movement, and increase the risk of inflicting some
people
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 injuries
due to
Linking Words
 crowding.
Furthermore
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, the gathering of many
people
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 in one place is a big
harm
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for
Change preposition
to
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 ecology. When a place is becoming more popular among foreigners, it is inevitable that new tourist attraction points will be built, the construction of which is a process connected to
emission
Add an article
the emission
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 of various polluting matters and
destruction
Correct article usage
the destruction
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 of ecosystems,
such
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 as deforestation.
Additionally
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, tourists are likely to inflict
harm
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 to the surrounding nature themselves –
people
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 usually don’t dispose of their garbage,
thus
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 causing serious ecological
harm
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.
Nevertheless
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, despite the negative consequences of
overtourism
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, it is not devoid of positive effects. Namely, the increase in the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of visitors is a significant boost to the country’s economy. Since
the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourists usually spend large amounts of money on their vacation, the government enjoys a great income, which may be spent on enhancing the living conditions and infrastructure.
To conclude
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,
although
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 the popular practice of going overseas for leisure is an enjoyable way to spend time and a good source of income for countries popular among
the
Correct article usage
apply
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visitors, the problem of
Use synonyms
overtourism
Correct your spelling
over-tourism
over tourism
 and its consequences
such
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 as crowding and ecological
harm
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 unavoidable
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and may overshadow the positive effects of
such
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 practice, and should not be ignored.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more development and provide specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence
Ensure that your paragraphs have clear topic sentences and that each main point is fully supported within that paragraph.
structure
Good introduction that clearly states your opinion on the topic.
cohesion
Effective use of transition phrases to connect ideas, which aids in coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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