IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays, there are many TV shows that allow ordinary people to go on television and become celebrities, even though really, they have no talent. People should not be allowed to go on TV shows unless they can demonstrate some skill or talent that is entertaining. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

In recent years, the proliferation of reality
television
Use synonyms
 has given rise to a new breed of celebrities —
individuals
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 who often achieve fame without any evident skill or
talent
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.
While
Linking Words
 some argue that appearing on
TV
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 should be reserved for those with genuine abilities, I believe that
this
Linking Words
 perspective is overly restrictive.
Although
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talent
Use synonyms
-based programs offer substantial value,
television
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 should remain a space for diverse human experiences, not just showcases of skill. On one hand, it is understandable why some
people
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 advocate for limiting
TV
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 appearances to talented
individuals
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. The traditional role of
entertainment
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 has long been to inspire, impress, or educate through exceptional performance — whether in music, dance, acting, or other creative fields.
Talent
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 shows like The Voice or Britain’s Got
Talent
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 uphold
this
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 standard, rewarding
individuals
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 who possess extraordinary abilities. Restricting
TV
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 access to skilled participants could, in theory, maintain higher content quality and protect audiences from being influenced by negative or superficial celebrity culture.
However
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, the definition of
entertainment
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 has evolved. Reality
TV
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 shows
such
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 as Big Brother or Keeping Up with the Kardashians thrive not because of displayed
talent
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, but because they tap into human curiosity, drama, and relatability. Many viewers find
entertainment
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 in the unscripted, everyday interactions of ordinary
people
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. In
this
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 context, charisma, authenticity, and relatability become a form of social skill — not easily quantifiable, but
nonetheless
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 engaging. To dismiss these qualities as “no
talent
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” is to overlook the complexity of modern media consumption.
Moreover
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,
television
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 can serve as a mirror to society, showcasing a wide spectrum of lifestyles, values, and perspectives. Allowing ordinary
individuals
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 on
TV
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 promotes inclusivity and democratizes media, giving voice to
people
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 from different backgrounds.
This
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, in turn, can lead to greater social awareness and empathy among audiences. If access to
TV
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 were limited only to those with traditional talents, many stories worth telling would go unheard. In conclusion,
while
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 it is important to celebrate and reward
talent
Use synonyms
 in
television
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 programming, I strongly disagree with the notion that only skilled
individuals
Use synonyms
 should be allowed to appear on
TV
Use synonyms
.
Entertainment
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 comes in many forms, and the presence of ordinary
people
Use synonyms
 on screen reflects the diversity and richness of real life. Rather than diminish the medium, it broadens its appeal and relevance in a modern, inclusive society.

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Task Achievement
While your main points are well developed, providing a few more concrete examples or anecdotes could enhance your argument. This can help illustrate your ideas more vividly.
Coherence and Cohesion
To further improve coherence, consider using more varied linking words or phrases to better connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This can help guide the reader more clearly through your thought process.
Structure
Your essay has a strong introduction that clearly lays out your argument and a well-defined conclusion that reinforces your perspective.
Content
You present a balanced view, acknowledging the value of talent-based shows while also advocating for inclusivity in media representation, which adds depth to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • celebrities
  • demonstrate
  • entertaining
  • talent
  • skills
  • motivate
  • diverse
  • relatable
  • personal growth
  • financial mobility
  • social mobility
  • cultural diversity
  • platform
  • voice
  • standards
  • rewarded
  • content
  • quality
  • opportunities
  • television industry
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