Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do?

It is true that a small number of young people

plays

Correct subject-verb agreement

play

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

these days. There are many reasons why

this

Linking Words

is the case but steps can definitely be taken to solve the problems. There are two main reasons why it impacts on physical health.

Firstly

Linking Words

, schools and universities not prioritizing

sports

Use synonyms

can affect physical activity.

Correct your spelling

show examples

lack of exercise with

sports

Use synonyms

can pose

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a sedentary lifestyle because of increased screen time

such

Linking Words

as social media, video games and TV.

For example

Linking Words

South

Change preposition

in South

show examples

Korea, the education system places a strong emphasis on academic achievements, leaving students with little time for

sports

Use synonyms

and physical activities.

Secondly

Linking Words

, lack of motivation to participate in

sports

Use synonyms

the

Correct article usage

show examples

serious problem owing to

high

Correct article usage

the high

show examples

costs of

sports

Use synonyms

equipment and applying for membership fees. A salient example of

this

Linking Words

is in some states of Japan

sports

Use synonyms

like tennis and golf require expensive gear and club memberships, making them less accessible to children from low-income families.

As a result

Linking Words

among

Change preposition

apply

show examples

young children may appear low motivation to take up a sport.

However

Linking Words

, some steps can be taken to solve

this

Linking Words

issue.

Initially

Linking Words

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should introduce mandatory

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

classes in schools and universities

as well as

Linking Words

promote

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

events and competitions.

Additionally

Linking Words

, engaging in

sports

Use synonyms

can be beneficial for health.

For instance

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Finland has integrated

sports

Use synonyms

as a crucial part of the school curriculum, with the government implementing special programs to encourage physical activity among students. A good example of

this

Linking Words

is Canada, where free

sports

Use synonyms

programs are being introduced in public schools and universities to promote physical activities. In conclusion, not prioritizing

sports

Use synonyms

and the high prices of

sports

Use synonyms

equipment are the main reasons, I believe that it has various negative effects

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

on young teenagers.

samandarabdusattarov16Fri May 09 2025

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task achievement

The essay addresses the task and provides some reasons for the decrease in young people participating in sports. However, more depth and detail could be added to both the reasons and solutions.

coherence and cohesion

A clearer logical progression between ideas can strengthen the coherence of your essay. This includes ensuring each paragraph has a clear main idea that ties back to the thesis.

task achievement

Incorporate more specific examples and evidence to support your key points. This would enhance the credibility of your arguments and provide a deeper understanding of the issues at hand.

structure

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing the main points effectively.

content

You have made relevant points regarding the lack of motivation and accessibility of sports, which are important issues.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary
engagement
incentives
obesity
recreation
well-being
peer pressure
physical fitness
endurance
balance
teamwork
coordination
confidence
self-esteem
discipline
facilities
accessible
affordable
curriculum
extracurricular
inclusion

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Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do?

Your opinion

As more and more information is available online, the role of textbooks has become obsolete. Therefore, universities should replace traditional books with digital materials. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Working abroad can help employees earn a great deal of money and gain more benefits. However, some people think this trend has many negative impacts.

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

*The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives.* *To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement*

When choosing the best candidate for a job, employers should consider personal qualities more than qualification and experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement