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Writing Samples
Band 7

As the political and social conditions around the world are transforming the trend of the immigration is increasing day by day . What do you think what can be positive and negative impact of immigration

It has been observed that with the growing instability in political and social conditions across the globe,
immigration
Use synonyms
 rates are rising steadily. If questioned, I believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks of
immigration
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 to a large extent. My position is elaborated
further
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 with reasons and examples. Examining my opinion, the strongest benefit of
immigration
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 is the economic growth it brings to host countries. Immigrants often take up jobs in sectors facing labour shortages and contribute significantly to productivity.
For instance
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, many developed nations like Canada and Germany rely on immigrant workers to sustain industries
such
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 as healthcare, construction, and agriculture.
Moreover
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,
immigration
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 leads to cultural diversity and global understanding. When people from different backgrounds live and work together, it fosters tolerance and creates a rich multicultural environment, which can be seen in cities like London or Toronto.
On the contrary
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, there are some drawbacks of
immigration
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.
To begin
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 with, it can create pressure on public services. A sudden increase in population
due to
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 high
immigration
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 may lead to overburdened healthcare systems, schools, and housing markets.
For example
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, in major European cities, authorities have reported rising rent costs and increased wait times in hospitals
due to
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 rapid immigrant influx.
Additionally
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, in some cases,
immigration
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 may lead to social tension if locals feel that newcomers are taking away jobs or altering cultural norms.
To conclude
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, there are both merits and demerits of increasing
immigration
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.
However
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, I believe that
immigration
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 is more advantageous because it boosts the economy, enriches cultural experiences, and helps countries adapt to demographic challenges
such
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 as
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
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 populations. With proper policies and integration efforts, the negative impacts can be effectively managed.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure to provide clearer topic sentences that explicitly state the main point of each paragraph. This helps in enhancing the logical flow between ideas.
Task Achievement
Consider addressing more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments and further substantiate your points about economic benefits and social tension.
Task Achievement
Strong introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize the essay's stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and varies sentence structure, contributing to overall clarity and engagement.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • migration
  • economic growth
  • cultural diversity
  • innovation
  • entrepreneurship
  • public services
  • social tensions
  • xenophobia
  • demographics
  • policy decisions
  • job creation
  • host country
  • community cohesion
  • nationalism
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