In some countries, some criminal trials in law courts are shown on television so that the general public can watch them. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

From my perspective, It can be an advantageous way in the purpose of giving a lesson to the people because the future cannot be predicted. Everyone has the possibility to face dangerous conditions caused by criminals. The information regarding assault can be provisions for us to be aware of for ourselves and our loved ones.
However
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, It can have a dangerous impact if the children watch television without an older companion,
such
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as duplicating the same violent action. The criminal actors that can be seen on electronic or online media are followed by the story behind it called news. The criminality background, strategy, and location are told in the news, which helps us to have a sense of how the attack can happen. Specific disturbances can have the same pattern,
for instance
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, robbery can happen in public facilities where the community do the money transactions,
such
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as malls, markets, or banks. By understanding
this
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information, society can be more cautious of the same condition in real life.
On the other hand
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, It can be a social burden and shame for the family of the villain, because they may be accused by society too. Social judgement can trigger traumas that they hardly do their daily activities. Another negative side is the copy-paste action of the group who watch these criminal trials. Several news in Indonesia reported that the underaged children became criminals, triggered by the disorder they had seen,
such
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as burning houses or killing innocent folk. The older people's responsibility is needed here to guide what the group watches and learns. In summary, I think the violent actors and actions that can be seen on television can be a learning source for public safety for the population. With the right guidance from the older, learning can be beneficial for all generations, including children. Government regulation is
also
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urgently needed to control the digital content on television.

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task achievement
Consider making your thesis statement clearer in the introduction. Clearly outline the main points you will discuss in the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words and phrases to improve the connections between your ideas, which will enhance the flow of your argument.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points in order to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents relevant ideas and reflects on both the advantages and disadvantages of broadcasting criminal trials.
coherence and cohesion
Your awareness of the impact of criminal trials on children shows a thoughtful perspective on a critical issue.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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