Deforestation caused by human activity is happening in many parts of the world, with serious results for the environment. What do you think can be done to solve this problem?

Nowadays human action affect the environment causing serious ecological problems. One of the great examples is deforestation. The logging industry causes huge changes in ecosystems, basically, it contributes to the erosion of soil, losing habitats of wildlife animals and more importantly
affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
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air quality. In my opinion, to protect the surroundings from the activities of people, the government worldwide should give more attention to the production items and practices of logging manufacturers.
Firstly
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, all the countries have to implement environmental policies, which include laws and guides for the controlling of different industries.
For instance
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, implementing sustainable practices related to cutting the emission of greenhouse gases and decreasing industrial runoffs can improve environmental conditions.
Secondly
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, the government should encourage industries that use eco-friendly practices. Basically, they should decrease their taxes on production products.
For example
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, eco-friendly packaging can help lessen the plastic waste in landfills. And
this
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will cut the volume of waste, which contributes to the damage to the soils, sea and oceans. All these actions will benefit the environment, and more importantly, they will help to maintain the ecosystem and biodiversity.
Also
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, will not affect the human food chain. Because, microplastic has an effect on the life of aquatic animals, especially marine life.
For example
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, recently I read a research article about how microplastics were found in the langs of fish. Eating
this
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fish
also
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can vanish for human lives. Basically, causing different diseases related to hurt attacks. In conclusion, not only governments are responsible for protecting the environment, but
also
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each person has to properly participate in the protection. They have to think about opportunities and actively participate in the prevention. Maybe they will not be able to do severe objects, but little activities can
also
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be useful.

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear viewpoint on deforestation and suggests possible solutions, which is commendable. However, try to develop your ideas more thoroughly, especially in your main points. Each point should be detailed and explained comprehensively to provide a stronger argument.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your essay is generally logical, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To improve coherence, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that relates to the main argument of the essay. Additionally, linking phrases could help connect your ideas more fluidly.
task achievement
While you provided relevant examples, they need to be more specific and well-explained. Increasing the detail in your examples will illustrate your points effectively and strengthen your essay as a whole.
task achievement
You have a clear understanding of the topic and demonstrate a solid commitment to addressing deforestation and its consequences. Your call to action for both governments and individuals is a strong point.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of a variety of vocabulary and sentence structures adds depth to your writing, making it engaging to read. This is a positive aspect of your essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Deforestation
  • Biodiversity
  • Afforestation
  • Reforestation
  • Sustainable/sustainability
  • Urbanization
  • Timber
  • Infrastructure
  • Indigenous populations
  • Climate change
  • Ecosystem services
  • Ecotourism
  • Biodegradable
  • Renewable resources
  • Carbon footprint
  • Conservation
  • Environmental degradation
  • Habitat destruction
  • Enforcement
  • Regulation
  • Awareness campaigns
  • Corporate responsibility
  • Supply chains
  • Illegal logging
  • Satellite monitoring
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