Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

The contemporary discourse surrounding societal interdependence presents a fascinating dichotomy:
while
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some argue that modern life necessitates a greater reliance on others, a compelling case can be made for an increasing trend towards individual autonomy.
This
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essay concurs with the latter perspective, contending that advancements in financial literacy, widespread access to skill acquisition, and technological innovations have collectively empowered individuals, thereby diminishing their traditional dependencies. A cornerstone of
this
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burgeoning self-sufficiency is enhanced financial literacy. In an era often characterized by economic volatility, individuals are increasingly equipped with the acumen to manage their finances prudently, making informed decisions regarding expenditure and investment.
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heightened financial responsibility not only facilitates the logical allocation of income and the cultivation of savings for unforeseen circumstances but
also
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significantly reduces the likelihood of indebtedness. In Vietnam,
for example
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, a cultural emphasis on careful financial planning,
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accessible information on personal finance, allows many citizens to navigate their economic lives with considerable independence, thereby fostering resilience against financial shocks. The argument that economic specialization inherently deepens interpersonal reliance – citing,
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, our dependence on medical professionals – certainly holds merit. The intricate web of a modern economy is woven from specialized roles, each contributing to the collective well-being.
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,
this
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perspective arguably overlooks the transformative impact of the digital age on skill acquisition. The proliferation of online resources, particularly platforms like YouTube and myriad e-learning portals, has democratized knowledge to an unprecedented extent. These platforms offer vast repositories of DIY tutorials and educational content, enabling individuals to master a diverse array of practical skills, from basic home repairs to complex software applications,
thus
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mitigating the need to rely on specialist services for numerous tasks.
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, technological advancements are undeniably forging new pathways towards individual empowerment and reduced reliance on direct human assistance. The market is increasingly saturated with innovative products and services designed to support autonomous living, ranging from sophisticated smart home ecosystems to intuitive self-service applications for banking, retail, and even preliminary healthcare diagnostics.
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, integrated AI assistants like Google Assistant or Amazon Alexa can manage manifold household functions remotely, offering users unparalleled control over their domestic environment without necessitating the physical presence or aid of another person.
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technological integration streamlines daily life and significantly enhances an individual's capacity for independent living. In conclusion,
while
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the specialized nature of contemporary economies does foster certain interdependencies, the overarching trajectory indicates a significant movement towards greater individual autonomy. The confluence of enhanced financial independence, the democratized access to a broad spectrum of skills, and the enabling power of modern technology
has
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have
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cultivated a generation more self-reliant and less dependent on others for their daily and long-term needs.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay presents a well-structured argument that effectively discusses both perspectives. You clearly state your opinion in the introduction and support it throughout the essay. However, to enhance your score, you might want to ensure that each paragraph connects smoothly to the next, ensuring the flow of ideas is not just logical, but also smooth and seamless.
Task Achievement
While you provide relevant examples that support your argument, adding a few more specific examples could strengthen your points further. For instance, mention particular studies or statistics regarding financial literacy that illustrate your points about economic independence more concretely.
Task Response
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and states your opinion, providing a solid foundation for your discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay utilizes a variety of transitional phrases and structuring elements which contribute to a coherent argument across the paragraphs.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • interdependence
  • globalization
  • technological advancements
  • collective action
  • digital evolution
  • minimal reliance
  • direct interaction
  • empowered
  • access to technology
  • societal expectations
  • personal choice
  • leverage
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