IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

With increasing populations and ever growing urban centers, many countries are losing their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

Because of the growing world population and enlarging urban centres, most countries have begun losing their natural
areas
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. In rapidly developing countries it is more significant to protect places of natural
beauty
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.
This
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 essay will discuss the benefits of
this
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 and how the issue can be resolved. Protecting places of natural
beauty
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 brings many benefits to both the
city
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 and the country. First of all, these
areas
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 help protect the environment. Forests, mountains, rivers, and lakes are very important for wildlife habitat of animals and plants.
Secondly
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, natural
beauty
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 spots improve air and water quality in cities. It is healthy for people to breathe clean air and use natural waters that are not chemically polluted.
Also
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, these natural
areas
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 attract many tourists and help
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city's
Correct article usage
the city's
show examples
 local economy.
For example
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, The number of tourists who come to see the natural places of Ismayilli has increased 3 times and
this
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 will bring twice as much income to the
city
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's economy. To prevent losing natural
beauty
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 spots
of
Change preposition
in
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 countries government officials must take serious steps.
Initially
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,
instead
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 of building new houses in
city
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 centres, they can build new settlements around the
city
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, both to ensure the settlement of the population and to protect natural
areas
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.
Additionally
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, In order to protect rivers, lakes, and seas local municipalities can create committees. They can supervise the circulation of water and the cutting of trees.
For instance
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,
as a result
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 of the activities of volunteer groups established in Australia's inner cities, they could prevent losing natural
areas
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 3 times more. In conclusion, despite the expansion of urban
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
, the protection of natural
areas
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 is very beneficial for both the
city
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 and the country.

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task achievement
Consider providing a wider range of specific examples to support your points, which would enhance your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay and to help outline your arguments more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and provides a clear thesis statement about the benefits and solutions to protecting natural beauty spots.
task achievement
You effectively mentioned economic benefits from tourism, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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