Give detail information about the crimes in the newspaper and on television has the bad consequences.Some suggest that govenment should impose some resptrictions.To what extent you agree or disagree.

Continuous exposure to violent crimes in the news can desensitize viewers, leading to increased acceptance of violence in society.

Therefore

Linking Words

, some restrictions should be implemented by higher authorities. I agree with the notion, as I have some valid reasons to support my opinion.

First

Add an article

The first

show examples

and foremost reason is that continuous coverage of crimes can create a sense of

fear

Use synonyms

and insecurity among the public, often referred to as 'mean world syndrome'.

This

Linking Words

will lead to the ruin of kindness in society and will reflect a harsh nature.

Moreover

Linking Words

, children and teenagers may be particularly affected by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

violent media

content

Use synonyms

, leading to aggressive behaviour and fearfulness

instead

Linking Words

of awareness. To demonstrate

this

Linking Words

point, research

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

conducted by psychology staff in Japan found that 40% of the crimes are committed by young people, influenced by violent media

content

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, exposure to continuous violent news can have a negative impact on society. To mitigate these situations, some strict measures must be taken by the higher authorities.

This

Linking Words

includes restrictions on crime reporting, which could lead to a more balanced portrayal of events, allowing for positive stories to be told and reducing

fear

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

reporting crime gives a sense of awareness,

this

Linking Words

type of

content

Use synonyms

should be restricted to children. By following these measures, the government can

consequently

Linking Words

reduce the insecurity and

fear

Use synonyms

among people.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

coverage of violent

content

Use synonyms

in media gives a sense of awareness, continuous exposure can lead to

fear

Use synonyms

, insecurity and a mean world.

Therefore

Linking Words

, higher authorities must take some measures to cope with

this

Linking Words

situation,

for instance

Linking Words

reduction of

Wrong verb form

reducing

show examples

crime reporting and making

this

Linking Words

content

Use synonyms

restricted for children.

ipuri645Sun May 18 2025

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task achievement

Your essay presents a clear stance on the issue and reasons to support your argument. However, including more diverse examples or statistics could strengthen your argument and provide a broader perspective.

coherence and cohesion

Consider strengthening the connections between your ideas and paragraphs to enhance the flow. Using linking phrases can help reinforce the relationships between your points more effectively.

coherence and cohesion

You have a clear introduction that states your position on the issue, and you conclude your essay effectively by summarizing your main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

desensitize
mean world syndrome
overestimation
fearfulness
media literacy
aggressive behavior
panic
anxiety
restrictions
perpetrators
victims
coverage
societal norms
vulnerable populations
violent incidents
sensationalism
balance
portrayal
public perception
responsible journalism

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Give detail information about the crimes in the newspaper and on television has the bad consequences.Some suggest that govenment should impose some resptrictions.To what extent you agree or disagree.

Your opinion

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the reasons that cause stress, and effects #stress #countries #world #effects

Nowadays, more and more people are choosing to work from home instead of commuting to an office every day. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people feel that learning a foreign languageis an essential component of a child's education. Others feel that learning a foreign language is often a waste of time that can be better spent on learning technologyand other vocational subjects. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?