Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Certain individuals believe that the most efficient
stratergy
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strategy
to enhance the
health
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of a general population in an area is by increasing the
availablity
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availability
of athletic recreational
centres
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.
While
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,
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apply
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others argue that it would have a minimal impact and
additional
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that additional
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interventions are needed. In
this
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essay, I'll discuss both views and will and will express my opinion.
One
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On
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one
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the one
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hand, increasing the number of athletic
centres
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and improving their
accessibilty
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accessibility
will improve the interest of people to participate in a daily
work out
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workout
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routine.
Firstly
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, the increased frequency of working out on a daily basis improves the
overall
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mental
health
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and physical
health
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.
Subsequently
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, the
the
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apply
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gradual improvement in the
overall
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health
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of a population will contribute to an active society focused on growth.
Overall
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,
sport
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sports
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amneties
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amenities
will improve the quality of life individually and collectively over time.
On the other hand
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, only increasing the number of
sport
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sports
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centres
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does not
gurantee
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guarantee
that everyone will improve their
health
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.
For instance
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, building other facilities
such
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as wellness
centre
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centres
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, hospitals and counselling
centres
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can collectively improve the
overall
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health
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of the society through prevention and cure when
neccessary
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necessary
intervention is needed.
In addition
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, clean and healthy food should be promoted through cuisines at the wellness centre which is
neccessary
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necessary
for recovery and prevention. In conclusion, I state that developing athletic
centres
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only will not efficiently contribute to
the
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apply
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overall
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wellness as other facilities should be considered
along with
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the
sport
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sports
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centres
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to synergistically enhance the outcomes.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to make your introduction clearer by summarizing the different views more simply.
coherence and cohesion
Work on linking your ideas more clearly, especially when moving from one point to the next.
task achievement
Use clearer examples to support your points, as this will strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to check your spelling and grammar, as these mistakes can affect your score.
task achievement
You present both views and give your opinion clearly, which is important for this type of essay.
task achievement
Your ideas about the benefits of sports facilities are good and show understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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