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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that it is more common way to learn history by watching movies instead of reading books. Does the advantages of this ought weight the disadvantages? Find essays with the same topic / Report

It is often debated whether watching
movies
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 is more effective than reading
books
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 when it comes to learning
history
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.
While
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films
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 can bring historical events to life, I believe that
books
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 provide a deeper and more accurate understanding.
This
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 essay will discuss both sides before presenting my viewpoint.
Films
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 can make historical content more engaging and accessible, especially for visual learners. Through storytelling, costumes, and realistic sets,
movies
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 allow viewers to visualize historical events and connect emotionally with historical figures.
For example
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,
films
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 like Schindler’s List or Lincoln have helped many people understand key moments in
history
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.
Additionally
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,
movies
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 can appeal to those who find reading difficult or time-consuming, making
history
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 more inclusive.
However
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, historical
films
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 often prioritize drama over accuracy. Directors may alter facts for entertainment, which can lead to misunderstandings about real events.
For instance
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, many students believe myths portrayed in
films
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 without verifying them through reliable sources.
In contrast
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,
history
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books
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 are usually written and reviewed by experts, ensuring a more factual and comprehensive account. In conclusion,
while
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 historical
movies
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 can spark interest and provide visual context, I believe that reading
books
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 offers a more detailed and reliable source of historical knowledge. For a complete understanding, a combination of both methods may be ideal.

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task achievement
Make sure all your points clearly support your main argument.
task achievement
Be careful with the ideas you present. You could explain some points in more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use linking words or phrases to connect your sentences better.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion is good but could summarize your main points more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader.
task achievement
You provide good examples like 'Schindler’s List' and 'Lincoln' to support your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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