IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that they should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both these views anf give your opinion

There is no denying the fact that the development of the child helps to improve his future.
while
Linking Words
 it is a commonly held belief that
kids
Use synonyms
 need
to begin
Linking Words
 learning at school from a young
age
Use synonyms
. There is an argument that opposite
this
Linking Words
 idea by saying children need to go to school at older
age
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will analyze
this
Linking Words
 topic from both points of view and
then
Linking Words
 I will express my opinion. On one hand. The minds of the
kids
Use synonyms
 are more flexible to learn at a young
age
Use synonyms
.
In other words
Linking Words
,
kids
Use synonyms
 will understand more knowledge because they have time and the ability to learn.
In addition
Linking Words
, early ages are essential to a child's development and character.
For example
Linking Words
. They start to choose their future jobs at a young
age
Use synonyms
, and that will help them to
archive
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
 it.
on the other hand
Linking Words
, parents focus more on the suitability of the child. It is possible to say that, a young
age
Use synonyms
 is very important in
kids
Use synonyms
' feelings, so they make sure that children stay in a safe culture.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the flexibility of time is a lot for children,
for instance
Linking Words
, parents will spend more time with their
kids
Use synonyms
 because they will see them more at the house. In conclusion , there are no easy answers to
this
Linking Words
 question. On balance,
however
Linking Words
, I tend to believe that is important for
kids
Use synonyms
 to start learning at an early
age
Use synonyms
 because it will help them to develop at a young
age
Use synonyms
 and that will benefit them for their future jobs.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion
Your introduction gives a clear view of the topic. Make sure to also summarize your points in the conclusion clearly.
task achievement
Try to use more examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Make sentences clearer. For example, instead of 'It is possible to say that, a young age is very important in kids' feelings,' say 'Young age is important for children's feelings.'
task achievement
You present both sides of the argument well, which shows good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive development
  • social interactions
  • educational foundation
  • structured learning
  • emotional and psychological readiness
  • effective learning
  • cost-effective
  • childcare centers
  • explore their interests
  • creativity
  • love of learning
  • parental burden
  • economic considerations
  • childhood freedom
  • natural learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: