IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

After Staying in a hotel in another city for a week when you got home, you discovered that you had forgotten something of value in the hotel room. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter, •Describe the item you forgot and say where you left it •ask hotel to send it to you •Suggest a way to pay for the postage.

#hotel #city #week #home #value #room #manager #•describe #item #•ask #•suggest #postage
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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 to seek your help with a forgotten item during my stay at your hotel. My name is Jaimini Patel. I stayed at your hotel The Grand from 15th November to 20th November, in room no. 205. In a hurry to catch the flight, I left my black coloured wallet with a small golden chain in frontside wallet in the room which I kept on the side table beside the bed. I humbly request that you look for it and once you find it, please courier it to me at my registered address, which I have mentioned during check-in formalities. Else you can call me on my mobile to confirm my address. After completing the process of booking with a trustworthy courier company, kindly send me all the details of the parcel
along with
Linking Words
 the charges and bank details and I will pay you for all the costs on an immediate basis. Looking for your urgent co-operation into the matter. Yours Faithfully, Jaimini Patel.
Submitted by jaimini2000 on

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Task Achievement
For task achievement, ensure to expand on each point to fully meet the requirements of the task. While the response is complete, adding more details about the value of the item and its personal significance could enrich the content.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, using a variety of cohesive devices and paragraphing strategically will strengthen the logical flow of ideas. Consider beginning a new paragraph for each new topic or request, and use transition words to guide the reader through the different points addressed in the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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