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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Do you agree?

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Introduction
In recent years, online
education
Use synonyms
 is more attractive than traditional classroom learning.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with
this
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 statement as online learning provides a flexible schedule, personalized lessons for each student, and a required amount of digital
devices
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.
Body paragraph 1
It is vital to understand that
students
Use synonyms
 manage their
time
Use synonyms
 flexibility through studying online.
In other words
Linking Words
, online
education
Use synonyms
 not only allows
students
Use synonyms
 to learn everywhere or without geographical barriers or distance
,
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apply
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 but
also
Linking Words
 does not waste
time
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-travelling
such
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 as offline
education
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.
As a result
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, it is e-learning that reduces the pressure for
students
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 to feel comfortable and spend their
time
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 on leisure activities to improve physical and mental health.
Body paragraph 2
Another point worth mentioning is that
students
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 select suitable lessons with their ability and
time
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.
That is
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 to say, a data-driven system can adapt to individual learning styles and progress, resulting in their study being improved.
For instance
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, some folks fit in with evening study
time
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 since these conditions will make brains more productive and comfortable.
Hence
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, virtual learning helps people choose courses that suit their daily schedule and academic level.
Body paragraph 3
However
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, some argue that online
education
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 needs many digital
devices
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. Simply put, some regions do not have reliable internet or access to
devices
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, especially in some countries where residents have low incomes, and do not have enough finance to purchase these.
Nevertheless
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, government or philanthropy funds can support poverty through economic development
as well as
Linking Words
 technological growth.
Therefore
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, most places have the internet and technological
devices
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 for economic advancement.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 some argue that virtual learning needs a lot of digital
devices
Use synonyms
, it supplies
students
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 with flexibility and personalized lessons. If folks want to have more
time
Use synonyms
 for other activities, they should choose e-learning to manage
time
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 effectively.

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task achievement
Make sure to include more clear examples to support your ideas throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Use a stronger linking words to connect your ideas better, making the flow smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion and includes a clear outline of your main points.
task achievement
Review the conclusion to make sure it summarizes the key points effectively and reinforces your opinion clearly.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear viewpoint on online education benefits.
task achievement
The use of examples, like studying in the evening, adds depth to your argument.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of paragraphs is mostly clear, with each discussing a main idea.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-Learning
  • face-to-face education
  • remote learning
  • virtual classroom
  • webinar
  • digital platform
  • self-paced learning
  • interactive learning
  • course accessibility
  • academic networking
  • pedagogy
  • synchronous/asynchronous sessions
  • MOOCs (Massive Open Online Courses)
  • edtech (educational technology)
  • holistic development
  • practical skills
  • collaborative learning
  • digital divide
  • curriculum adaptation
  • technological literacy
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