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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Mental health is as important as physical health. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

As awareness of
overall
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 well-being grows, some believe mental
health
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 has a greater effect on daily
life
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 and relationships,
while
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 others argue that physical
health
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 should take priority
due to
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 its
life
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-threatening nature. I personally believe that mental
health
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 is more important, given its hidden but lasting consequences.
To begin
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 with, mental
health
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 plays a crucial role in how people function in everyday
life
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, as it shapes their thoughts,
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
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, and relationships. When it is neglected, conditions
such
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 as depression can lead to emotional breakdowns or long-term isolation.
In contrast
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, physical injuries typically improve with treatment,
whereas
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 mental
health
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 problems often worsen silently, which leads to a steady decline in
overall
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life
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 quality.
On the other hand
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, some believe physical
health
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 should come first since it directly impacts survival.
For instance
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, illnesses like heart attacks or strokes demand urgent medical attention, and if left untreated, they can be fatal. From
this
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 perspective, physical
health
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 serves as a foundation for many aspects of
life
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, including mental well-being.
While
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 physical conditions usually receive immediate care, I believe mental
health
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 is even more important, largely because it continues to be overlooked by both society and healthcare systems. Mental issues are often dismissed or misunderstood
due to
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 stigma, which prevents individuals from seeking support.
As a result
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, these problems remain untreated, gradually eroding quality of
life
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 in more subtle but damaging ways. In conclusion,
although
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 physical
health
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 deals with urgent medical threats, mental
health
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 has a deeper and longer-lasting impact on how people live. If greater attention and resources are not directed toward mental well-being, more lives will suffer silently, making it essential to prioritize it on a broader scale.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea or topic sentence to guide the reader.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points, especially in the discussion of mental health's impact on daily life.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion summarizes the main points clearly, reinforcing your opinion.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion and engage with both sides of the argument well.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical flow, making it easy to follow your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • chronic diseases
  • nutrition
  • plant-based foods
  • gut flora
  • fiber content
  • saturated fats
  • mental health
  • nutritional deficiencies
  • vitamin B12
  • iron
  • omega-3 fatty acids
  • dietary restrictions
  • vegetarian diet
  • whole grains
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