In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years,the

numbers

Fix the agreement mistake

number

show examples

of young

people

Use synonyms

engage

Correct pronoun usage

who engage

show examples

in work-related training

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

more than attending university

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

this

Linking Words

phenomenon has become increasingly common in some countries.

Although

Linking Words

there are some drawbacks,

Fix capitalization

show examples

firmly believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks

overall

Linking Words

. One significant advantage is

Use synonyms

people

Correct word choice

that people

show examples

who engage in work-related training will improve their efficiency

about

Change preposition

show examples

finding

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

This

Linking Words

means that it can

saves

Wrong verb form

save

show examples

Use synonyms

people’

Check wording

people’s

show examples

time

instead

Linking Words

of learning professional knowledge that they might not use in their future life.

Furthermore

Linking Words

,individuals will know what kind of job is suitable for them,so they can earn money as soon as possible and

promote

Verb problem

improve

show examples

their quality of work.

For example

Linking Words

,70% of

people

Use synonyms

claim that they find the dream job after

graduated

Wrong verb form

graduating for

show examples

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

years and after

gathered

Wrong verb form

gathering

show examples

experiences.Another major benefit is

individuals

Correct word choice

that individuals

show examples

will bolster their own abilities through work-related training.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

way can reduce the gap,especially for those

people

Use synonyms

who are not good at learning school

curriculums

Replace the word

curricula

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

can improve their competitiveness,which can

lays

Wrong verb form

lay

show examples

a solid foundation for their future career

Punctuation problem

show examples

However

Linking Words

,there are

also

Linking Words

some drawbacks associated with choosing work-related training .One possible downside is that they couldn’t do some jobs that

need

Verb problem

require

show examples

high qualifications

Linking Words

such

Punctuation problem

, such

show examples

doctor

Correct article usage

a doctor

show examples

and

engineer

Correct article usage

an engineer

show examples

This

Linking Words

could lead to young

people

Use synonyms

less some vacation choices.Meanwhile,these jobs need higher requirements

as well as

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fierce

competitions

Fix the agreement mistake

competition

show examples

However

Linking Words

,these problems are relatively limited and can be mitigated

through

Change preposition

show examples

finding other proper jobs.

For instance

Linking Words

,medical students have a chance to

Verb problem

become

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

doctor

Fix the agreement mistake

doctors

show examples

until they become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

postgraduate

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

.That means youngsters who attend training might lose the opportunity to become

some

Fix the agreement mistake

apply

show examples

professional workers,but they have a wide range of choices. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

enrolling

work-related

Change preposition

in work-related

show examples

training

instead

Linking Words

of going to university does have some negative aspects,

Fix capitalization

show examples

believe that its

advantage

Fix the agreement mistake

advantages

show examples

are far more significant than its

disadvantage

Fix the agreement mistake

disadvantages

show examples

chunyanh502

Nov 9, 2025

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language

Fix the grammar. Use short, clear sentences.

structure

Make one main point in each paragraph. Start with the idea, then give a tiny explain, and finish with a small result.

content

Add one simple example that fits the idea and is easy to check.

task response

The writer shows a clear view that benefits are bigger than drawbacks.

coherence

There is a clear plan: intro, body, and conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

work-based training
enrol
university
advantages
disadvantages
practical skills
experience
workforce
employment
earnings
opportunities
further education
theoretical knowledge
career options
exploitation
balance

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In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people say that what individuals do to protect cannot make a difference, others say that individuals can protect the environment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that the best way to resolve environmental problems is to increase fuel and vehicles’ prices. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?