It is often said that governments spend too much money on project to protect wildlife, while there are other problems that are more important? Do you agree or disagree?

There is currently a contentious argument over whether the government should allocate more budget to natural conservation over other important societal issues that the nation is dealing with. I completely disagree with the statement as investing in conservation
projects
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promotes the country’s tourism and plays an essential part in combating
climate
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change
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and global warming The main reason why I believe that investing in
wildlife
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projects
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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important is because it will encourage foreign tourists who are passionate about
wildlife
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to visit the country and
therefore
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contributes
Correct subject-verb agreement
contribute
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to that country’s GDP. There are many countries in the world where
wildlife
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tourism contributes to generating their GDP.
For example
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, Kenya though a very small and underdeveloped country generates its GDP through tourism. The Masai Mara National Reserve and Nairobi National Park are one of the world’s biggest
wildlife
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reserves. Every year, thousands of tourists visit these national reserves to see beautiful and extinct
wildlife
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creatures. Another reason why I believe natural conservation
are
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is
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essential in combatting
climate
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change
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. Many species play an important role in absorbing carbon dioxide.
For example
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, many rainforests and ocean ecosystems absorb vast amounts of carbon dioxide which helps in mitigating global warming. If governments reduce their spending on
wildlife
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projects
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, it could undermine the long-term goals to reduce
climate
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change
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effects, ultimately worsening the socio and political issues related to
climate
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change
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.
Therefore
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, the money spent on protecting
natural
Correct article usage
the natural
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ecosystem is an investment in achieving long-term sustainable development goals. In conclusion, I would say, that
while
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it is important for the government to look after the other crucial societal matters of the country, investing in
wildlife
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projects
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holds equal importance in protecting biodiversity, maintaining the ecosystem and sustaining human life.

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Task Achievement
Your introduction clearly states your position on the topic, which is good. However, consider adding a brief outline of the main points you will discuss. This helps guide the reader through your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your ideas are mostly organized well. Using clear topic sentences at the start of each paragraph can help even further to guide the reader. Make sure every paragraph focuses on only one main idea.
Task Achievement
You used relevant examples. Try to include a few more examples or details that directly relate to your points to improve the strength of your arguments.
Positive
You have a clear opinion on the topic, and you backed it up with reasons and examples which is great!
Positive
Your conclusion nicely summarizes the main points and restates your view, effectively wrapping up the essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • conservation efforts
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem health
  • eco-tourism
  • environmental degradation
  • interconnectivity
  • inherently linked
  • quality of human life
  • effective government spending
  • complement each other
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