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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiene.

In recent years, the issue of the role of
parents
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 and schools teach
children
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 to become good
members
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 of
society
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 has emerged as a matter of significant concern to the general public.
While
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 some individuals maintain that
parents
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 should teach
children
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 how to be good
members
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 of
society
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, I contend that
school
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 is the place to learn
this
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.
This
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 essay aims to provide a comprehensive of these differing viewpoints. On the one hand, it is essential to recognize that individuals should acknowledge the significant advantages associated with
parents
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 always teaching
children
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 to become good
members
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 of
society
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. A crucial consideration is how to take care of themselves, which highlights that they can learn what to eat, how often to work out and whether to get enough rest or not.
In addition
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, another point to emphasize is
parents
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 teach how to manage their finances.
This
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 is
due to
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 the fact that they can learn to save money for the future, live within their means, and avoid debt or not.
Moreover
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,
children
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 can learn from their
parents
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 how to treat others, or more precisely, how to handle conflict and how to be tolerant and deal with differences of opinion.
On the other hand
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, it is crucial to consider the opposing viewpoint that the
children
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also
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 can learn many things from
school
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. A significant factor to explore is that they can learn many basic knowledge, which underscores that
school
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 provides basic knowledge about various subjects
such
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 as math, English, history,...
Furthermore
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, it is essential to highlight that they can learn thinking skills.
This
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 assertion is supported by the fact that schools help
children
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 develop thinking skills, including critical thinking and creative thinking.
Besides
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,
school
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also
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 provides for
children
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 independence and self-confidence, which highlights that they can develop independence and self-confidence, including time management, and problem-solving. In conclusion, an analysis of the differing perspectives on the role of
parents
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 and schools highlights that
children
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 learn from their
parents
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 and they can learn from
school
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. Ultimately,
it is clear that
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children
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 learn many things from their
parents
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 so that they become good
members
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 of
society
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.
This
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 examination prompts individuals to thoughtfully consider their preferences and the experiences that influence their enjoyment.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to make your main points clearer and more connected. Show how they relate to your main argument.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your ideas. This will help your argument and show a better understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your main opinion. This will help guide your writing.
task achievement
You have made a strong attempt to discuss both views, which is a good aspect of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
You used some good vocabulary, which helps express your ideas clearly.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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