IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Your workplace does not have a parking area for cars, and it is causing some problems. Write a letter to your manager and include the following: – Describe the problems it has caused. – Explain what benefits a parking area would bring to the company. – Suggest a solution

#workplace #area #cars #manager #company
Dear Mr. Johns, I am writing
this
 letter to express my concern about the parking lots for cars in our office. You are aware that we have recently relocated and do not have parking facilities in
this
 building. Allow me to explain the issue in detail.
Due to
 an increase in
workforce
Correct article usage
the workforce
show examples
, the number of vehicles has
also
 increased.
As a result
, we are facing problems with
parking
Correct article usage
the parking
show examples
 area. The vehicle owners have to park their cars on roadsides and whatever vacant space
available
Add a missing verb
is available
show examples
 near the office building.
Therefore
, I believe that management should address the aforementioned query to avoid chaos in front of the building and unauthorized parking problems. Having our own parking space will make the parking process easier and save the time of employees. In order to solve the problem, may I suggest renting a nearby vacant parking space and appointing a security guard to assist car owners and prevent confusion. In
this
 way, the problems caused by
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of free parking will be resolved. Looking forward to receiving
yours
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
respond
Replace the word
response
show examples
 as fast as it is possible. Yours sincerely, Ravi Winterson
Submitted by 8453525 on

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Task Response
To enhance your task response, ensure that all task requirements are thoroughly addressed. While your letter covers the main topics, it could benefit from providing more detailed examples of the specific problems caused by the lack of parking spaces and further elaboration on the benefits a parking area would bring.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, consider incorporating transition words and phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. While your letter is structured well, using phrases like 'Firstly,' 'Moreover,' and 'In conclusion,' can help your writing flow more smoothly.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • inconveniences
  • designated
  • punctuality
  • productivity
  • enhanced
  • potential
  • demonstrates
  • acquiring
  • vacant
  • arranging
  • agreement
  • implementing
  • shuttle service
  • encouraging
  • carpooling
  • incentives
  • subsidies
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