IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people said that it is kind of waste if people plan for the future and it is more important to focus on the present. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Planning is the most important skill that every individual must know to lead a happy and stress-free
life
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. Some people have a perspective that thinking about the
future
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 possibilities in your present days will never be a good option. I strongly believe that
Use synonyms
focus
Wrong verb form
focusing
show examples
 on the days, you are living at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 particular
time
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 will keep you happy, motivated and excited for the upcoming
time
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. To commence with, there are several reasons that bolster my opinion. First of all, it is very important to have a
focus
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 in your brain,
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 in today's fast-moving
time
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 and competitive world. There is a lot of information our brain needs to remember on
daily
Correct article usage
a daily
show examples
 basis,
that
Correct word choice
and
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 if anywhere it
forget
Correct subject-verb agreement
forgets
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 something, it
can
Verb problem
apply
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may affect the entire day or a week.
Therefore
Linking Words
, staying focused is something that should be the first priority of every individual.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, living in the present
time
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 helps a person to stay away from the stress and worries of the
future
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.
This
Linking Words
 behaviour can result in, living
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
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 to the fullest type of attitude.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if a person keeps on thinking so much about the
future
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 it will result in overthinking, lack of
focus
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 and motivation in day-to-day
life
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 and unfortunately, lack of success which no individual wants. As per the recent survey at the University of my city, there is an increase in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of people who are opting for different and bad ways to handle stress in day-to-day
life
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. Some get addicted to drugs and some lose their sense and commit suicide.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
this
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 will never be a better option than the first one. To sum it up, I would strongly want to convey my message to the people of the world to gain
focus
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,
be
Correct word choice
and be
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 more creative and exciting in daily
life
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 by taking less stress about
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future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
. If
this
Linking Words
 everyone
adopt
Change the verb form
adopts
show examples
this
Linking Words
 change,
then
Linking Words
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
 would be a better place to live.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has one clear main idea. This will help your reader follow your thoughts better.
task achievement
Try to use clearer examples that directly support your main points. This will make your argument stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Work on linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your ideas. This improves the flow of your writing.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion and you express it strongly. This is good for making your argument clear.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your points well and reinforces your main message.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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