IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It will be better for both society and individuals is driverless cars - cars can drive themselves- become more widely used. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is thought that Automated
cars
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 have a positive impact on society and
people
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.
However
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, I partially agree with that statement because
driverless
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cars
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 provide independence for those who are unable to
drive
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. but It could be exposed to cyber threats and system errors. On the one hand, self-driving vehicles offer greater independence to those who can not
drive
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. In other words, The elderly and
people
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 with mobility disabilities often require assistance to
drive
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,
while
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this
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 experience allows them to feel comfortable and independent.
For example
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, A statistic presented that
driverless
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cars
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 offer a noticeable well-being experience for
people
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 who have mobility disabilities, leading to an increase in the number of self-driving car sales in the UK.
Therefore
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,
this
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 advancement in the car industry had a significant positive impact on both society and individuals.
On the other hand
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, self-driving
cars
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 could be exposed to many technical
issues
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such
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 as system failure and cyberattacks, which are the two most common
issues
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 that can affect negatively road and passenger safety.
In other words
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, it is difficult to trust advanced technology
due to
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 the expected
issues
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 associated with these technologies
such
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 as vulnerabilities and errors.
For instance
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, a survey conduted by BBC newspaper presented that 31% of
people
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 those who using these
cars
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 struggle with an error with the key bottom, which is a common problem. These kinds of
issues
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 leads to decline the demand .
Moreover
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, there is an increase in cyberattacks against
driverless
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 vehicle companies, resulting in a sharp decrease in self-driving car demand. In conclusion, I partially agree with the suggestion that
driverless
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cars
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 are better for both society and individuals because
although
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driverless
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cars
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 provide independence for those who are unable to
drive
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, They could be exposed to technical and cyber risks.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction. Expand your supporting points with more detail and examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words to connect ideas better between sentences and paragraphs. This will help improve the flow of your writing.
Positive Highlight
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion. The examples used are relevant and provide good support for your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomous vehicles
  • artificial intelligence
  • advanced sensors
  • alleviate
  • enhance
  • streamline
  • revolutionize
  • minimize
  • mitigate
  • optimize
  • eco-friendly
  • sustainable
  • urbanization
  • traffic flow
  • transportation infrastructure
  • carbon emissions
  • accessibility
  • independence
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