IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays, news companies spend a lot of money covering international news. However, local news is more relevant to people's lives and should receive more funding.' To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

There is an ongoing debate about whether mass
media
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 should allocate more budgets to local
news
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 or not. In fact, in recent days,
news
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 companies have been allocating a lot of money to international
news
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.
Hence
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, in
this
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 essay, I will discuss these distinct viewpoints and explain why I strongly support the opinion that local
news
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 should receive more funding.
To begin
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 with, we need to reconsider the benefits and drawbacks of foreign
news
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 in terms of ordinary
citizens
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.
For example
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, nowadays, there is an ongoing trend that individuals are being regarded as
citizens
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 not only of their nations but
also
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 of
this
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 planet.
This
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 indicates that it is important for us, global
citizens
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, to understand international situations.
However
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, in real contexts,
this
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 type of
information
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 is not practical for us.
On the contrary
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, what people genuinely need is local
information
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,
such
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 as the renovation of the city hall in their towns and the disaster that happened there recently. By obtaining these categories of
news
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, they can enhance their living standards because,
for example
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, they can enjoy new facilities constructed lately around their living places and can avoid potential dangers brought by regional disasters.
Therefore
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, local
news
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 is more valuable than international
news
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 for normal residents, and mass
media
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 should invest more money in regional publications.
On the other hand
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, as implied above, the benefits brought by international
news
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 are notable because people can broaden their own perspectives by being exposed to advanced content. As an example, when I research economics at my university, I always use English articles published by international
media
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 because the
information
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 I can obtain from them is helpful for me to observe a specific object from various perspectives.
In other words
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, without multinational
media
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, my research content would be more superficial, indicating the importance of worldwide
information
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 for experts.
However
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, it becomes obvious that
this
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 type of
news
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 is effective only for minor groups in society and that ordinary people are not too interested in cultivating
this
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 type of advanced
information
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 by themselves. These findings reveal that it is more meaningful for
news
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 companies to publish more local
news
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 than international
news
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due to
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 higher demands.
Thus
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, they should allocate a larger expenditure on regional content. In conclusion, even though there are several advantages brought by international
news
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, the group which can enjoy those advantages is limited. Meanwhile, there are higher demands for local
news
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 in terms of ordinary
citizens
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, and publishing companies can make a large profit by capturing those demands.
For
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this
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 reason, I completely agree with the statement that mass
media
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 should allocate more budgets to local
news
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Try to provide clearer examples for your points, especially in the introduction and conclusion. Make sure they clearly link back to your main idea.
coherence and cohesion
In some sections, the ideas could flow better. Use more linking words to show how your points connect. This will help your reader follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion and support it well throughout the essay. Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are well-organized, with each one focusing on a main idea that supports your argument.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • immediacy
  • relevance
  • community cohesion
  • investigative journalism
  • accountability
  • mismanagement
  • economic argument
  • globalization
  • cross-cultural understanding
  • well-rounded global perspective
What to do next:
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