An increasing number of larger shopping malls, areas and departmental stores are leading to the decline number of smaller corner shops. What are the advantages and disadvantages

Theme of on growing amount of big
malls
Use synonyms
, shopping areas and other huge shopping areas is important for big cities. And there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
a lot of different positive and negative sides for both customers and merchants.
FIrst
Correct your spelling
First
show examples
of
all
Add a comma
all,
show examples
there are some disadvantages. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
the biggest thing is that customers can have
freshier
Correct your spelling
fresh
food from smaller
corner
Use synonyms
shops
Use synonyms
. It's connected with time we
spending
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
in a way to a shop. With
decreasing
Correct article usage
the decreasing
show examples
of small
corner
Use synonyms
shops
Use synonyms
customers should spend more time in traffic jams or
subways
Change preposition
on subways
show examples
to big shopping
malls
Use synonyms
. The second thing I can name as
disadvantage
Add an article
a disadvantage
the disadvantage
show examples
of
growing
Correct article usage
the growing
show examples
number of shopping
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
is less noize around small
corner
Use synonyms
shops
Use synonyms
. Imagine if all
people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the city, like Berlin
for example
Linking Words
,
will use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
only one big mall for shopping. As for me there will
Add a missing verb
be absoluteley
show examples
absoluteley
Correct your spelling
absolutely
packed and
noizy
Correct your spelling
noisy
place. Of
course
Add a comma
course,
show examples
there are some advantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
increasing
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
of
malls
Use synonyms
. One of them is easier delivery of goods to
shops
Use synonyms
in big shopping
malls
Use synonyms
. It will produce lower prices.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
there will be less pollution because of
shorter
Correct article usage
the shorter
show examples
ways to the
shops
Use synonyms
. And the second positive side I want to show is less time for commuting between different
shops
Use synonyms
with different types of goods.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
if you need to buy a laptop and some
groseries
Correct your spelling
groceries
. If you prefer
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
shopping mall you will be
needed
Add the particle
needed to
show examples
go to different
shops
Use synonyms
in one big building and that's it. And vice versa if you choose small
shops
Use synonyms
near your home you will need
go
Fix the infinitive
to go
show examples
to
this
Linking Words
shop and to
other shop
Change the wording
another shop
other shops
show examples
with laptops. More of
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
shops
Use synonyms
can be placed in different corners of the city.
This
Linking Words
arguments
Change the determiner
argument
show examples
shows different sides of
increasing
Add an article
the increasing
an increasing
show examples
amount of big
malls
Use synonyms
and shopping
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
and closing small
corner
Use synonyms
shops
Use synonyms
. But I believe people in big cities need both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
big
malls
Use synonyms
and small
shops
Use synonyms
near their houses.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your opinion about the advantages and disadvantages.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points, such as mentioning a specific mall or area.
task achievement
You identified both advantages and disadvantages in your essay, which is important for this topic.
task achievement
Your effort to express your ideas is commendable, and you clearly value both types of shops.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: