Nowadays some people believe that fashion is very important for youngsters and it has a negative impact on the people and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today's era, some individuals think that
fashion
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plays a significant role in the life of youngsters, and it negatively affects
the
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apply
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people and
the
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apply
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society as well. I agree with
this
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notion because I believe that admiring, and earning name and fame make them more materialistic and feel pressurized which can ruin their lives. One of the most common reasons for favouring
this
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notion is that the youth is highly influenced by social media and of
course
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course,
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their role models encourage them to follow similar trends. Without thinking twice, adults try to copy their favourite personalities by wearing fashionable clothes whether it is acceptable or not in society. Another point is that youngsters have a curiosity to earn a name and fame in society at an earlier age. Because of social media, they simply post their photos and videos on their public accounts to earn likes, views and comments from the public. To remain in the line of
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fashion
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the fashion
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industry, they spend money on buying expensive brands
such
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as Gucci, Nike Prada etcetera.
Furthermore
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, some individuals are from poor backgrounds, and their peer pressure forces them to be a part of the fashionable world. So, they insist their parents buy trendy clothes. After getting no support from their parents, they feel
pressurized
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pressured
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, and their anxiety compels them to take the wrong path.
Last
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but not least, many young people spend too much money on buying fashionable things like clothes, cars and other accessories.
Consequently
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, they become materialistic and face financial problems by spending all their savings to gain views from the public.
To sum up
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,
fashion
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has become an essential part of adult's lives but it impacts them badly. I think following their favourite celebrities on social media inspires them to buy the latest brands and the desire to fit in the
fashion
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world, makes them consumerist and stressed which may wreck their life.

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coherence and cohesion
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task achievement
You presented a clear opinion on the topic and supported it with reasons.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fashion
  • youngsters
  • negative
  • impact
  • society
  • express
  • identity
  • creativity
  • pressure
  • trends
  • money
  • financial
  • materialism
  • self-esteem
  • confidence
  • anxiety
  • stress
  • styles
  • industry
  • realistic
  • body images
  • self-worth
  • social divides
  • afford
  • trendy
  • clothes
  • feelings
  • exclusion
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