IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the age of digital communication and social media, face-to-face interactions are becoming less common. Some people think that this is decreasing people’s ability to communicate well in person. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

Many
people
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 argue that the growing use of social media leads to
human
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humans
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 experiencing a
declined
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decline
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 in
real life
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real-life
show examples
communication
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 skills. I completely agree with
this
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 view because elements needed to communicate in a physical
format
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 are significantly different from virtual
communication
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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such
Linking Words
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skill
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skills
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 must be
practiced
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practised
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.
This
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 essay will present the arguments supporting my opinion. One key reason why I agree is that face-to-face
communication
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 is more complex than social media interaction.
This
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 is because
to convey
Wrong verb form
conveying
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 a message that grabs
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people
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people's
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 attention requires not only a good main idea, but
also
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 supporting elements in presenting the idea, including intonation, articulation, body posture, and facial expression
;
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,
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 which
those
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apply
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are rarely used in digital
communication
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.
For instance
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, when delivering
comedy
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a comedy
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 script before
audience
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an audience
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, a
stand up
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stand-up
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 comedian must perform an engaging stage act to gain
a
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apply
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wide attention, which
that
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apply
show examples
cannot be implemented in a virtual setting.
Therefore
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, it is evident that
an
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apply
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excessive virtual
communication
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 without
practicing
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practising
show examples
 a real
format
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 will lower
people
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's in-person
communicate
Replace the word
communication
show examples
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skill
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skills
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. Another important point is that physical
communication
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 is a practical
skill
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 that should be trained frequently. A good illustration of
this
Linking Words
 is digital messaging applications,
such
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 as WhatsApp and Instagram,
allow
Correct pronoun usage
which allow
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 individuals to interact with minimal
efforts
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effort
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 via text messaging, resulting in a shift in
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people
Check wording
people's
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 preference from speaking to texting.
As a result
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, they will find
communication
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 in a
real time
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real-time
show examples
format
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 is an uncommon and uncomfortable activity. In conclusion, I strongly believe that the more
people
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 communicate through social media will hinder their
communication
Use synonyms
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skill
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skills
show examples
.
This
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 is primarily
due to
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 different speaking
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format
Fix the agreement mistake
formats
show examples
 and insufficient speaking training.
Hence
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,
people
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 should be encouraged to interact with
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 in reality to help improve their verbal
communication
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.

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task achievement
Your introduction should clearly state your opinion on the topic. Make sure your thesis statement is strong and direct.
coherence cohesion
Try to use clearer linking words to connect your ideas, like 'firstly', 'secondly', and 'finally'. This helps the reader follow your thoughts better.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea that relates back to your opinion in the introduction. This will strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion from the start, which helps to set the direction of your essay.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to back up your points, such as the comedian’s performance in person vs. online.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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