Some people claim that public museums and art galleries will not be needed because people can see historical objects and works of arts by using a computer. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is true that
museums
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and
art
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galleries
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play an indispensable role in everyone's life. Some
people
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think that historical objects and
arts work
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art works
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can be seen by using digital devices
instead
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of building
special
Correct article usage
a special
show examples
place for that. I disagree with
this
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notion. I believe visiting
museums
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and
galleries
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provides real-life
experience
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,
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
social interaction and
enhance
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enhances
show examples
their interest towards these antique items. One of the main reasons
of
Change preposition
for
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disagreement is that
prople
Correct your spelling
people
can get real-life
experience
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by visiting
museums
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and
art
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galleries
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. They can know about the names of different historical objects and the history behind them by seeing
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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closely.
For example
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,
Provide
Wrong verb form
providing
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VR headsets
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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their visit enjoyable and
also
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provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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deep information regarding the different historical monuments in a museum.
In addition
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, different
museums
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and
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art related
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art-related
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galleries
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try to preserve the culture and various antique items which were used in the past.
For instance
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, ancient tools, coins, clothes and artworks provide a tangible connection to the past
civilizations
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civilisations
show examples
and their way of life.
Moreover
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,
people
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can increase their interest and curiosity when they interact with others in a museum. In
this
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way, they can share their own learning
experience
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with them and know about the historical periods from them
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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is essential for fostering the community.
Additionally
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, having different
museums
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and
art
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galleries
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encourage
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encourages
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young
people
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to know about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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ancient
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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is not possible by watching it on digital devices. On
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
show examples
, they can only see images and videos
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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unable
Verb problem
are unable
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to create an emotional connection and inspiration that
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
show examples
from only by visiting these places.
To sum up
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,
Undoubtedly
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undoubtedly
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,
museums
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play a significant role
for
Change preposition
in
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preserving the historical culture and objects and by replacing
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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with digital
devices
Punctuation problem
devices,
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discourage
people
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to pay visit over there. I believe
having
Correct word choice
that having
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museums
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and
art
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displays
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
a valuable
experience
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,
increase
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increases
show examples
socialization
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socialisation
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and
boost
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boosts
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their learning towards
artifacts
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artefacts
show examples
.

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Grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay for spelling and grammar errors. For example, 'prople' should be 'people'.
Content
Try to use more specific examples to support your main points. For instance, mention specific museums or artworks to strengthen your argument.
Structure
Ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence to improve the structure of your essay.
Opinion
Your essay presents a clear opinion and stands firmly against the idea of replacing museums with digital devices.
Reasoning
You have provided reasons for your views, such as real-life experience and social interaction, which helps strengthen your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • museums
  • art galleries
  • historical objects
  • digital displays
  • experiences
  • appreciation
  • understanding
  • visiting
  • cultural heritage
  • educating
  • community
  • discussions
  • inspiration
  • connection
  • preserving
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