IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

There has been a significant role in evolving technology in classrooms and a huge impact on traditional teaching methods. Do you agree? Discuss with examples.

There is no denying the fact that evolving technology impacts traditional teaching.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that traditional ways were useful,there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion. I consider that the boost is insignificant with the old style of teaching.
To begin
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 with, it is easy to find information.
In other words
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, it is handy to use evolving technology to know many kinds of relevant topics of the specific subject you want to learn about it which helps you gain knowledge of different views.
In addition
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, the programs of learning it is beneficial to help students study at home by themself.
For example
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 PowerPoint app, a branch of the modern way now, when they finish the lesson, the teacher puts homework on it for like two days. During
this
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 time, they can answer the homework from home and send it to their instructor online. Another point to consider is studying online. It is
also
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 possible to say that people can have a high degree from the university without needing to leave their jobs to attend.
Moreover
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, the substantial difference between the recent and ancient is the price.
For instance
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, when you study online, you merely pay for the university rather than other expenses, you will pay as room,travel and food. It is
clarify
Replace the word
clear
show examples
 from
this
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 example which the better.
Finally
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, despite people having different views, I will go with new ways of teaching because they have more options that will be helpful to have knowledge and self-study at the same time.

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task response
Make sure to express your opinion clearly in the introduction and conclusion. Use phrases like 'In my opinion' or 'I believe' to help the reader understand your point of view better.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words (like 'firstly', 'next', 'finally') to improve the flow of your essay. This will help connect your ideas and make them easier to follow.
task response
Provide more specific examples and details in your body paragraphs to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments and show a deeper understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic and presents an opinion which is a good start.
task achievement
Some examples are provided, which help to support the points made.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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