Some people say that now is the beat time in history to be living what us your opinion about this. What other time in history would be interesting to live in?

There is a common
believe
Replace the word
belief
show examples
that
this
Linking Words
is the most pleasant period to live
life
Use synonyms
. I concur with
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
thoughts due
of
Change preposition
to
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obvious reasons in the present time
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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as advanced technology, improved healthcare
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
has better
Verb problem
makes
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living
easy
Correct word choice
easier
show examples
and better. The following paragraphs
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
explain these in
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
. In my Opinion, living in the present
century
Use synonyms
is better because the development of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
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and telephone has made it easy to communicate with a family member or friend who
stays
Verb problem
is
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miles away.
This
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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reduces the stress of travelling to meet with someone, relieves the impact of stress on the heart and eventually improves cardiovascular
health
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,
recent
Correct article usage
a recent
show examples
study showed that
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
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of workload on the heart
due to
Linking Words
impact
Correct article usage
the impact
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of long travels increases
life
Use synonyms
span by 60%.
Also
Linking Words
, the
health
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care sectors are now of quality standards, filled with
well trained
Use the right word
well-trained
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professionals,
health
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cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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become affordable
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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hospitals are accessible and
bulit
Correct your spelling
built
in every corner
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thus
Punctuation problem
, thus
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resulting in
reduced
Correct article usage
a reduced
show examples
number of individuals with poor
health
Use synonyms
, disabilities and Instant death. Living in the Olden days would have been a very good time to live
life
Use synonyms
because the masses had
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
value for family and culture
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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resulted in good home bond and friendship seen with the people of that period.
However
Linking Words
, the
20
Correct your spelling
20th
century
Use synonyms
was filled what lots of poor people with unfulfilled dreams.
For instance
Linking Words
,
reserch
Correct your spelling
research
carried out in Kenya in the 20th
century
Use synonyms
showed that 10 acts of suicide
attempt
Fix the agreement mistake
attempts
show examples
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
due to
Linking Words
poverty. In summary, I am of the opinion that the 21st
century
Use synonyms
is a better time to live in
due to
Linking Words
advancement
Fix the agreement mistake
advancements
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in technology,
improved
Correct article usage
an improved
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health
Use synonyms
care system
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
all resulted in improved
health
Use synonyms
and
Life
Use synonyms
span.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to provide clearer topic sentences to introduce each main point in your paragraphs. This helps the reader understand the flow of your ideas.
task achievement
Make sure to proofread your work for grammar and spelling mistakes. For example, 'believe' should be 'belief', and 'built' should be 'built'.
task achievement
Include more specific examples and details to support your points. For instance, mention a specific technology or healthcare improvement that has changed lives.
task achievement
You presented a clear opinion and supported it with reasons, which is a key aspect of writing.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which supports readability.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technology
  • information
  • healthcare
  • diseases
  • treated
  • longer
  • freedoms
  • opportunities
  • environment
  • awareness
  • protect
  • planet
  • modern
  • safety
  • rights
  • life
  • time
  • history
  • people
  • world
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