In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. You should use your own ideas, knowledge, and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

There is a bit of controversy when it comes to

obesity

Use synonyms

as a

serios

Correct your spelling

serious

disease. In some communities, many individuals believe

the

Correct article usage

that

show examples

ads about junk

food

Use synonyms

consumption should be prevented, leading to

obesity

Use synonyms

While

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the

rests

Fix the agreement mistake

rest

show examples

, myself included, would contradict the mentioned idea. I concur with the viewpoint that it does

not

Rephrase

apply

show examples

any

Correct determiner usage

show examples

relevance between

obesity

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and junk

food

Use synonyms

advertising

preventation

Correct your spelling

prevention

. Both

Change preposition

apply

show examples

views have their own opinion which will be discussed in

this

Linking Words

essay. On the one hand, there is a well-established fact that

advertisng

Correct your spelling

advertising

consumption of unhealthy dietary habits and

high-calory

Use the right word

high-calorie

show examples

foods might

plays

Wrong verb form

play

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as crucial factors, which should be prevented

to intake

Verb problem

from being consumed

show examples

Correct article usage

the

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long run. In essence, low-nutrient

food

Use synonyms

Fix the agreement mistake

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

obesity
junk food
advertising
banning
influence
dietary habits
calories
nutrients
exposure
impressionable
lifestyle choices
physical activity
nutrition education
balanced diet
freedom of choice
market economy
informed decisions
manipulated
advertisements
combat obesity

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Some people think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it's more important to reward student who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music and good behaviour). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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