IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Access to clean water is a basic human right. Therefore every home should have a water supply that is provided free of charge. Do you agree or disagree?

Clean
water
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 is one of the basic human rights that many
people
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 believe every householder should be provided with free of charge,
while
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 others hold an opposing view. Ultimately, I strongly believe that
people
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 should have easy access to clean
water
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 without germs. First and foremost, having access to clean
water
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 can reduce transmission of diseases between oneself and another. It can prevent disease transmission by filtering out pathogens or bacteria that can lead to life-threatening sickness.
For instance
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, diseases
such
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 as cholera are spread through dirty
water
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;
therefore
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, to prevent
this
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, clean
water
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 should be provided to maintain basic hygiene.
Moreover
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, clean
water
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 is used to wash one's hands, prepare food, and bathe
;
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
 indicating that
water
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 without any contamination is necessary to sustain a healthy lifestyle.
Furthermore
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, families with low income often struggle to gain
accessibility
Replace the word
access
show examples
 to clean
water
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due to
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 high price levels,
such
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 as expensive
water
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 and electricity bills.
Due to
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this
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,
people
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 reuse unfiltered
water
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 or obtain it from an unclean site to prevent any excessive cost, which can lead to the transmission of diseases and poor health.
For example
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, many regions across Africa currently lack clean
water
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 , and
people
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 often retrieve
water
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 from contaminated lakes or ponds, causing harm to those who drink the
water
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. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
water
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 should be provided by the government free of charge as
water
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 is a basic human right, rather than a privilege.
In addition
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, access to clean
water
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 can lower the number of sicknesses and provide opportunities for
people
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 with low incomes to use clean
water
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 in everyday life.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea that supports your argument.
Task Achievement
Add more specific examples to strengthen your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Review your sentence structure to make it clearer and more varied.
Task Achievement
Ensure every point connects back to the main idea of clean water as a right.
Task Achievement
The essay has a clear opinion on the topic.
Task Achievement
Good use of examples to illustrate the issues surrounding access to clean water.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraphs are organized and flow logically from one to the next.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • basic
  • human
  • right
  • water
  • supply
  • provided
  • free
  • charge
  • agree
  • disagree
  • health
  • essential
  • sick
  • diseases
  • supports
  • education
  • children
  • focus
  • learning
  • searching
  • better
  • futures
  • reduce
  • poverty
  • families
  • save
  • money
  • spend
  • important
  • needs
  • promote
  • equality
  • chance
  • access
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