Some people think that students should play more team sports , such as , football and vollyball , rather than individual sports as running and swimming , to what extent do you agree or dissagree ?

Physical

sports

Use synonyms

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

become a necessity among educational systems . It is argued

Correct word choice

that student

show examples

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

should focus on

team

Use synonyms

playing

Wrong verb form

play

show examples

over

singular

Correct word choice

individual

show examples

sports

Use synonyms

. Even though a

team

Use synonyms

contirbution

Correct your spelling

contribution

engourging

Correct your spelling

encouraging

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I do not agree that

this

Linking Words

is the most effective way of playing . Individual

sports

Use synonyms

benefits can not be neglected . One of them is the time flexibility . As these kind of

sports

Use synonyms

planed

Use the right word

planned

show examples

Change preposition

according to

show examples

one's desire and

availablity

Correct your spelling

availability

on the other hand

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

show examples

groups are committed to

scheduls

Correct your spelling

schedules

and all members should

attent

Correct your spelling

attend

on time

Linking Words

Such

Punctuation problem

, Such

show examples

as football matches and

chamiponships

Correct your spelling

championships

Furthermore

Linking Words

, lower

strees

Correct your spelling

stress

levels . When playing

Correct your spelling

individually

indiviualy

Punctuation problem

indiviualy,

show examples

whole

cocentration

Correct your spelling

concentration

will be on the activity

Correct pronoun usage

itself

show examples

self not on following

team

Use synonyms

rythms

Correct your spelling

rhythms

Consequently

Linking Words

, better results will be

acheived

Correct your spelling

achieved

. The effect on

human

Correct article usage

the human

show examples

body is

also

Linking Words

significant . Full body

excersie

Correct your spelling

exercise

will be gained from self-competitions

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

therefore

Linking Words

, fitness improves significantly .

In contrast

Linking Words

Change preposition

show examples

groups where the load is

devided

Correct your spelling

divided

among members and some of them may not get enough

excersing

Correct your spelling

exercise

. As an example , during competitions each person

play

Correct subject-verb agreement

plays

show examples

a role

depends

Wrong verb form

depending

show examples

on his

Use synonyms

team

Check wording

team's

show examples

assistance , if

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

his

collegue

Correct your spelling

colleague

did

shrevthe

Correct your spelling

the

play he will end the game without any

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

. Shared games may

provides

Wrong verb form

provide

show examples

excitment toghther

Correct your spelling

excitement together

with social connection

but

Punctuation problem

, but

show examples

also

Linking Words

results in

strees

Correct your spelling

stress

from time and load with lower rates of

movments

Correct your spelling

movement

To conclude

Linking Words

, the importance of

sports

Use synonyms

is proven

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

both single and

groups

Fix the agreement mistake

group

show examples

games are effective

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

neither should be neglected . So

Fix capitalization

show examples

dissagree

Correct your spelling

disagree

with

this

Linking Words

statment

Correct your spelling

statement

Qween.g7

Jul 23, 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the organization of your essay by clearly defining your main points and ensuring each point flows logically to the next. Use paragraphs effectively to separate ideas.

task achievement

Make sure your introduction clearly outlines your main argument, and your conclusion succinctly summarizes your points to strengthen your overall argument.

task achievement

Use more specific examples to support your points, which will make your arguments clearer and more convincing.

task achievement

You provide some good initial points about the benefits of individual sports.

task achievement

Your essay touches on both sides of the argument, which is important in discussing a topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

263 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Suggestions & mistake analysis
Find every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary
Expand your ideas and use the right words.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Food travels thousands of miles from farm to consumers. Some people believe we should buy food from the local farmers to protect environment and support local businesses. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Food transportation over long distances, from farms to consumers, has become a common practice in today's globalized world. However, there is an ongoing debate about whether we should prioritize buying food from local farmers to protect the environment and support local businesses. This essay will discuss whether the advantages of this approach outweigh the disadvantages.
7
band
Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent years, there has been a growing debate about education methods. Some opine that studying through entertainment has numerous benefits for students than reading books, although others argue that such a trend brings potential downsides. Personally, I believe that the advantages of learning from media far outweigh the drawbacks.
6.5
band
Today different types of robots are being developed which can serve as companions and workers to help at work and at home. Is this a positive or negative development?
Today, people have a great need for robots. This is why people are discussing the good and bad sides of robots. The rapid development of robots and their use in many fields is helping make our lives easier, but this doesn’t always bring positive results.
7.5
band
many television news programmes show pictures of events in the news which people find upsetting. While television has a duty to report important news, it should not bring disturbing images into people’s homes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In this contemporary era, television is considered an essential source of media, which provides information about the entire globe. Therefore, some people claim that news channels should place some restrictions on the broadcasting of disturbing images. I firmly agree with this notion and the reasons associated with this are elucidated in the upcoming paragraphs.
6.5
band
Advances in science and technology have contributed to various environmental problems. Some people suggest that adopting a simpler lifestyle would help preserve the environment, while others maintain that scientific and technological solutions can resolve these issues. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Advances in science and technology have had a negative impact on the climate. Some people believe that a simple lifestyle can protect nature, but others believe that technology and scientific methods can solve environmental problems. This article will discuss both perspectives and give my personal opinion on the matter.

Some people think that students should play more team sports , such as , football and vollyball , rather than individual sports as running and swimming , to what extent do you agree or dissagree ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Food travels thousands of miles from farm to consumers. Some people believe we should buy food from the local farmers to protect environment and support local businesses. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today different types of robots are being developed which can serve as companions and workers to help at work and at home. Is this a positive or negative development?

many television news programmes show pictures of events in the news which people find upsetting. While television has a duty to report important news, it should not bring disturbing images into people’s homes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?