IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table gives information about the number of international tourist arrivals in eight countries in 2009 and 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table gives information about the number of international tourist arrivals in eight countries in 2009 and 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given data chart provides the information about
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
 number
International
Change preposition
of International
show examples
inviduals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 who visited
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nine different countries during the two consecutive years 2019 and
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
 respectively.
Overall
Linking Words
, among all
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 France remains the highest in both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
years with zero change in proportion,
whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 Germany shows the greatest significant change
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 109 % as compared to others.
According to
Linking Words
 the data, top five countries shows the larger number of individuals who visited in holidays and other purposes and it remains same with the little significant changes in percentage
such
Linking Words
 as, no change for France, 1.5 % variation in the USA, 1.8 % for Spanish, 3.6 % for the United Kingdom and 2.3 % for Italians respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, among
rest
Check wording
the remaining
show examples
 four nations, in 2009
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
 of
indiviudals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 who visited Germany was 10
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 later shows
incredible
Correct article usage
an incredible
show examples
 increase in
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
that is
Linking Words
 24 and shows the
greater
Correct word choice
greatest
show examples
 tourist attraction with the proportion of 109 %.
While
Linking Words
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three,
Hongkong
Use the right word
Hong Kong
show examples
 being the
lowest
Punctuation problem
lowest,
show examples
 where
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
show examples
 gave no attention in 2010
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 exhibits
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
show examples
 ratio.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remains" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • country
  • number
  • international
  • tourist
  • arrivals
  • years
  • increase
  • decrease
  • compare
  • data
  • high
  • low
  • change
  • features
  • suggest
  • maintain
  • stable
  • trend
  • economic
  • reasons
  • popularity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: